Catholic High Blood...

2012-02-16T06:33:00.002+08:00

its the second time i am moving house since i arrived in London. mainly because i am very sensitive to noise. hence i have officially stayed in Gloucester Road, Hammersmith and South Kensington in just a matter of 4 months lol. when i came over i used to stay in a triple room (somehow i got allocated to that room). picture below:

the noise was quite horrible especially when one of my roommates skype, and there was zero privacy, so i couldnt concentrate on doing anything in the room. hence i appealed for a change in the room and i got my new accommodation in parsons house (below).

nice, cosy room eh? problem is, it is at hammersmith, which is 1h walk to school (i walk to avoid paying for the tube, never mind about that. flatmates were rather noisy. yes even though its an imperial managed accommodation it was a flat instead of a hall. and last friday they partied till like midnight and on sunday there was sooooo much noise coming through my door. the worst part about a flat here is that there is no living room for the noise to sort of diffuse. all there is were 4 rooms and a kitchen, shower and toilet. and my room was right opposite the toilet, which is in the middle of the shower and kitchen, meaning there was the most noise coming into my room. and they like to prop the kitchen door open and talk loudly.

now physics is a subject that requires a lot of thinking and insight, lots and lots of analysis and stuff, how could i concentrate with such noise? i need to achieve like near meditation state to capture the essence of physics and to gain a deeper insight into it. and the thing is that everyone was crowding around my corridor outside my room, sitting down on the floor and chatting, the night before my new year test! and there was chatting even at 1.30am. guess what, i couldnt sleep and had to drink coffee before going for the test. and yup, i screwed it up.

the corridor is very empty and narrow, which means it is perfect for echo. hence any noise within it is magnified to such a huge extent, and the doors are designed to slam. hence when ppl visit the toilet/kitchen especially in the morning i wake up and feel really screwed. and when they bump into each other the talking and laughter begins. i decided that this should come to an end last sunday when there was endless amount of laughter spreading from the kitchen. i simply had to move out. its wednesday now and i have already moved to a single studio apartment. now i am a mere 7-8 minutes to school. but the room is smaller even though there are stoves and a toilet and shower within it. (below)

i am now staying right beside south kensington, rent increased by a lot, and the great thing is that the noise level has finally reduced. so its private accommodation now. i have got to familiarize myself with the neighbourhood (again). well, when i moved out of my first hall (Fisher Hall), i kinda miss the environment around that area (even though i disliked my room). and when i moved out of Parsons House, i miss the nights strolling around that area too. now i am in South Kensington, and sooner or later i will grow attached to this area. its really funny, i have only been about 4 and a half months away from singapore and i already have things i would miss in London. how time flies, and how easily it is for me to feel attached to a neighbourhood. well of course, i miss singapore dearly. haha. hope i will enjoy living in this studio apartment of mine and that the noise will stay low!

2012-02-07T07:21:00.002+08:00

physics has really become a subject where u just apply all the math in a situation and fully expect to get all the answers, it just works, math is the ultimate logical reasoning tool. gone are those days when we try to picture the formation of a stationary wave by the superposition of incident and reflected waves at different intervals in time, the pictures we draw etc...this can be summed up in one single equation. again, it just works. i guess its much more efficient that way. there's simply no time to picture every single thing and reason it visually, and its not quantitative that way too. we can spend one whole day picturing about a situation when it could be summed up in a few lines of algebra/calculus etc.

of course, there are situations where we cannot even picture at all, like 4d space-time, wavefunctions etc. it just has to be that way. i love lecturers who try very hard to let us link the math with the physical situations that could be observed. but there are lecturers who just throw all the math and say, see, if u add/multiply/integrate this, u get this, so this happens, simple! i prefer the visual way, but its really a method of preference. there are people who prefer the mathematical rigour.

i came to university expecting to learn a great deal of math, and that has proven to be the case. funny thing is i dun really like calculus, especially when i have to integrate one whole long chunk of stuff without any physical meaning. and i mean it, long long chunks of stuff that even my tutor (a physics professor who has spent 34 years at imperial) has found unnecessary. yet i love vector calculus, everything is so visual, here the symbols are intimately linked with intuition. u can do it the intuitive way and get it right. theres no intuitive way for pure calculus, u have to follow the rules and do it to get it right, forget about intuition, it means nothing, just follow all the rules. i think i am beating about the bush but u see my point (hopefully).

today i had my fisrt electromagnetism lecture, i know its gonna be filled with vector calculus etc, surface integrals, line integrals etc etc to sum up magnetic fields, electric fields blablabla. thank goodness the lecturer tried hard to make us appreciate all the physical meaning behind it. he tried to focus on the experimental aspects and convinced us that it is as experimental as it is theoretical, it is true physics, to quote him. so i foresee interesting lectures ahead. and when he mentioned about the history of electricity and magnetism and how everything developed, i suddenly feel the fuelling passion in me again. thank goodness, its been a long time since i felt this way. after months and months of almost pure math without any physical interpretation. the lecturer agreed we had done too little physics in the first term..well, we need our math foundation to be able to grasp anything in the lectures ahead. everyone says that and i've got to agree. got to learn everything slowly and steadily i guess.

as much as i love the intuitive sense of things, intuition cannot solve and quantify everything.

4 months plus into university life, 4 months plus into a new overseas experience, 4 months plus away from home, away from my friends. i can't deny the fact that i certainly do miss home. i remember how i dreamt about my friends, students and family for so many consecutive nights during the first 2 months. i remember how everything seemed so strange, how i felt i do not belong here, how i started questioning my own identity. yet it all seemed fine now. its just a new environment, everyone takes time to adapt to it. walking around the streets filled with british, doing projects with europeans, british and people from other parts of the world seem normal now. the fact that 90% of the people i meet are not singaporeans seem normal too now. its just part of daily life.

yet 90% of my dreams take place in singapore. i really really long to take a break and sit down with my army buddies for supper, probably at some hawker centre or coffee shop, just like the good old days. those times, my army buddy would fetch me from my house, drive around the island to fetch all our other friends before sitting down at some famous stall to have a wonderful meal, roti prata, wanton mee, char kway teow. we would chat about anything, laugh about our army experiences etc...good old times... those are the truest of friends i have.

and i long to go back to catholic high, those good old days as a teacher. those days when i step into class feeling anxious when all the students started to greet me. those days when i cracked jokes in front of them, tried hard to teach physics to them, entertain their stupid questions. those days when we went to the library together, had lunch together, laughed together and had fun together. those days when i got to see my own teachers who have taught me 6 years ago. those were the best times i have had.

of course, i long to go home, the very place i grew up in, the same place i stayed at for 21 years. i long to walk around the neighbourhood, going to the hawker centres, the supermarkets, the bookshop, groceries stores etc. that place seems very very very far away now. and those times when i studied a lot and needed a break, i could just drop by the master bedroom and watch tv with my mum, telling her the things that happened in school etc. that was really one of the best ways to relax. now i simply dunno how to relax after a long day of mugging. the only thing i do is to go youtube, facebook etc. its too cold to go outside and take a walk. i regret spending so much time on the computer back at home, should have spent more quality time with my family.

well, having said all these, i will end it with the same conclusion, given a chance again, i will still come over to UK for my studies. it is worth the new experience, after all, some day, we all want to go out and see the world. true, there's no place like home, nothing beats the warmth, the familiarity, the love we have back at home. yet the opportunity to go overseas is too valuable and rare to be missed.

i'm flying back on 23rd march. which is about 45 days from now. will be back for a month, and i am really looking forward to it. i will be back in the same place i grew up in for 21 years. yet i guess i will look at everything differently, i will learn to treasure all those people around me, i will enjoy every little thing i do at home. i will take the opportunity to catch up with all my friends and closed ones. i dunno if its good or bad, but theres one major thing i've learnt, physics is not everything, true, the pursuit of our existence in nature and the very fabric of reality is a very noble one. yet, i must never forget the company of my family and friends, after all, we are human beings, as much as we want to find out about the fundamental workings of the world, we want to value our relationships with the people around us. the people who are dear to us, the people who make our existence all the more worthwhile. the importance of this previous sentence is something i had to fly overseas for 4 months to realize. boy, how naive was i.

2012-01-29T09:05:00.002+08:00

somehow i need to put things right again...
or maybe i'm pushing myself too hard.
whatever the case, something has to be done.
no, too many things have to be done...

2012-01-26T05:58:00.002+08:00

sometimes we wonder why things are going so perfectly well for another individual, while we are stuck in a big mess. it seems unfair, that every aspect of life seems to go so well for others, and so badly for us. it leads to envy/jealousy. and sometimes we wonder why we do not live up to our own standards. sometimes we hope everything could improve and change for the better. indeed, there are many things to be unhappy about in life.

yet when i start thinking about all these, i constantly remind myself to look at the bigger picture, and to think of the many things that i ought to feel happy about instead. indeed, there are many things to be happy about.

2012-01-22T10:16:00.003+08:00

i can't stand arrogant people, i really really cannnot stand arrogant people.

2012-01-10T07:18:00.002+08:00

i foresee good times ahead! 该是重出江湖的时候了！

2012-01-04T18:36:00.001+08:00

不求天长地久，只要曾经拥有?

2012-01-03T08:01:00.001+08:00

怀旧...为什么又这样子呢？
for auld lang syne my dear for auld lang syne...

2011-12-31T19:47:00.000+08:00

maybe i'm not the person i've imagined myself to be, after all...

2011-12-29T09:09:00.004+08:00

just watched this movie. this is a really sad film. and i realize i am beginning to like fantasy movies. this is a mixture of sci-fi, fantasy and romance.

some things are just not meant to be, no matter how hard we try. we won't attain it. sometimes it may appear absurd, but its just the way it is. will we be able to change reality to attain what we want? this is a tough question, sometimes we just have to bow down to fate, at other times, we may have to bow down to society. this is the sad fact about life.

of course, we should do whatever we can to fight for what we want. it is good to believe that as long as we fight hard enough, we can conquer all obstacles and attain anything. yet, we must remind ourselves that certain things are not achievable, if we do not remind ourselves of this fact, we may end up living in a world of fantasy.

let me give a trivial example, we can't defy the laws of physics in our technology and inventions. i guess thats enough to convince everyone about this fact.

2011-12-29T08:50:00.002+08:00

its winter break now. came back from germany about a week ago and i really miss that place! went to Munich and i absolutely love the culture and the people there. its really time for me to explore and get to know Europe now that i'm here. good thing i met my German friend from the Institute of Microelectronics while I was doing my attachment there. really nice of her to invite me over and to host me and my friends and bring us around. this is really a rare opportunity. it is also the first time i actually experienced snow and i remembered how excited we were. and it was snowing quite heavily too. we looked out of the window and literally exclaimed when we saw the snow! it snowed almost everyday when we were there and i really hope it snows in London soon.

back in london, i've got to study for an upcoming new year test (if not for that i would be touring all over Europe right now...)

i must be having the time of my life, experiencing European culture and getting to know more people, and having the rare and very sought after opportunity to study overseas. yet the word trade-off comes in all the time. yes we learnt that in economics (remember opportunity cost?) that is not just a man-made term in Economics, it applies to life, it applies to every decision that we choose to make in life. i raelly hate this word, hate this concept, yet it exists. because of that we have to make careful choices, because of that we cannot have everything that we want, it revolves around our lifes, and it controls us, it is the only limit that has been imposed on our lives.

from time to time, i see events posted in facebook groups (and it happened more than a couple of times) by my friends back at home. sometimes i wish i could join them, i wish i could go back to my sec sch as an alumni in the CO camp event a month ago, i wish i could eat supper and BBQ with my army friends next month. i wish i could join them after school from time to time just to catch up and chill, i wish i could go back cat high to help the juniors after school when i'm free, and i wish i could meet up with all my friends made throughout the years during weekends etc. if only i could have all of them by my side whiel i pursue my degree. yet all these are not possible now that i am out there in Europe, which is why i mentioned the word trade-off.

this word is so powerful it makes the word 'envy' meaningless. there is no need to envy people like me as i do have a lot of things i miss back at home, though im having the experience of a lifetime, the same applies to the people back at home, no need to envy them as they lack this experience though they have their friends and family by their side. that is, trade-off.

as to which situation is better, i cannot give an answer. it is too subjective. for me, i have chosen to come to Europe, and i have never regretted it, it is worthwhile coming here, leaving friends and family behind, to experience a new life, before going back. yet to some it is not worth it at all. so it depends...

2011-12-25T09:12:00.004+08:00

如果這是最好的結局　為何我還忘不了你　時間改變了我們告別了單純
如果重逢也無法繼續　失去才算是永恆　懲罰我的認真是我太過天真

難道我就這樣過我的一生　我的吻註定吻不到最愛的人
為你等從一開始盼到現在　也同樣落的不可能

難道愛情可以轉交給別人　但命運註定留不住我愛的人
我不能我怎麼會願意承認　你是我不該愛的人

如果再見是為了再分　失去才算是永恆
已死心的記憶為何還要再生

難道我就這樣過我的一生　我的吻註定吻不到最愛的人
為你等從一開始盼到現在　也同樣落的不可能

難道愛情可以轉交給別人　但命運註定留不住我愛的人
我不能我怎麼會願意承認　你是我不該愛的人

拿什麼作證　從未想過愛一個人
需要那麼殘忍才證明愛的深

難道我就這樣過我的一生　我的吻註定吻不到最愛的人
為你等從一開始盼到現在　也同樣落的不可能

難道愛情可以轉交給別人　但命運註定留不住我愛的人
我不能我怎麼會願意承認　你是我愛錯了的人

2011-12-13T08:21:00.001+08:00

多少次以为找到了幸福，却发现一开始就是个错误...

2011-12-10T09:18:00.002+08:00

maybe its better not to have known u at all...its not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.

2011-11-30T07:34:00.005+08:00

if you are smart and humble, i respect you.
if you are smart but at the same time a bloody show off, i despise you.

sometimes its not a good thing to be overconfident, sometimes you shouldnt think too highly of yourself as if everyone else is below you. sometimes people are just being humble when they say how bad they are in something, it doesnt necessarily mean u are really smarter or better. even if your iq is higher compared to everyone else, there is still something u will always be lacking in. pick any person around u and i will point out to u all the ways in which that person is better than u. i really hope you will change, but chances are you won't since this ego has developed in you for such a long time.

2011-11-26T08:18:00.002+08:00

had a great time with jiaqiang today. it was sort of a belated birthday dinner for me, and he treated me to dinner and gave me a present to encourage me! really i would have felt so terribly lonely if he were not here. it was nice meeting up with him again, my fellow cat high schoolmate and colleague (as we went back to teach together).

he was the one who helped me to get the opportunity to go back and teach, which gave me such wonderful and sweet memories before i left singapore. after jc, army and a*star attachment, it really feels good to go back and catch up with my teachers, and to help my juniors before i leave. as for today, i have never been so happy and relaxed for such a long time, esp when school is rather hectic now. it feels like i'm experiencing the good old days again, as we shared our memories in cat high, and do crazy things on the streets. shared all my problems with him and had a good talk.

it was just great, eating roast duck at chinatown, walking along the streets and finding a place to sit down and chat. i have never felt so relaxed since uni started. both of us really miss the boys back in cat high, but we agreed we need to move on and i need to stop living in the past. the path towards achieving our dreams has really just begun, there is a long way ahead of us.

well, we had a great bunch of teachers back in sec sch. i had mrs anna tan who actually bought chicken rice and waited outside the o level exam hall for us to finish our exams, so we could eat and study together in the library. and even till now when i went back to teach, she still bought lunch for me and brought it to my office, i dun suppose we can get that kind of teachers anywhere else.

yup so these were things we talked about, not to forget the endless encouragement i got from him.

2011-10-31T07:44:00.003+08:00

its one month into school and i've officially spent more time at imperial than that in cat high teaching my students. but why is it that i am sooooooo much more attached to them than to my uni? is it because i've been through 4 years in cat high? or is it cos i dun treasure what i have around me and only treasure what is no longer present? what if i never went back to teach them? who would i miss most in sg (family aside)? my army friends i suppose.

uni is starting to get tough, even i must admit that, though physics is always my very favourite. i'm starting to see just how much math there is to physics. even if u know what is going on, even if u develop that intuition, even if u know how to get to the answer in a physics problem, u better be good in math. else forget about solving anything.

2011-10-30T07:55:00.002+08:00

i will always help u, whenever i can, whenever u need. u've got no idea how influential u are to me. will always support u, no matter how u treat me. u know it, u know i'm willing to. it sucks that i can't help u now, that we are separated by half a globe. i am sad not for myself, but for the fact that i can't help. all i ask for is to let me know when u need help, when i'm back.

2011-10-24T22:09:00.002+08:00

u have got no idea how much i miss those times. how much that short period of time meant to me. how much i wish to go back. yet in our pursuits in life, we always have to move on. till now, the best times in my life are always temporal. i really hate this feeling.

why are things so different now? can u talk to me like in the past, again? i never wanted this to end. given a choice, i would continue on that very path. that very path which gave me joy, hope and pleasure every single day in my life. i silently pray...that u will talk to me again. like in the past. pleaseeee.

2011-10-13T05:16:00.003+08:00

and so, i'm at imperial now. years back, i was always dreaming about this day. when i would blog from london and share about imperial. yup. i was always looking forward to this day, imagining that this day would be as heavenly as possible. well, it IS INDEED good knowing i made it here, finally. yet i have forgotten to factor in the fact that i will miss family and friends..

days in school are generally good, lecturers are interesting, and i am looking forward to making new friends. this is a once in a lifetime experience and i must treasure it. yet when night time comes, and the cold sets in, the missing of friends and family comes into place, sometimes it can get quite terrible, esp when i wake up at night. generally the feeling subsides when i reach school and sit in lectures. the skies in london are almost always forever grey, and so it can look depressing. though exploring the city is fun and exciting in general. yup. and i miss my cat high students quite terribly. for the 4th time i have dreamt about them, and its only my 12th day here. i dream about them even during afternoon naps in the library when i close my eyes to rest, like i find myself teaching back in that school again. that is something i need to learn to handle.

my beloved students.

they say the first few days/weeks in london (or when u study anywhere overseas in general) are going to be the honeymoon/holiday period, and the next few weeks will be the homesick period. my honeymoon days are gone, the homesick period sets in. and soon, the adaptation to life here will set in, i need to look towards that. look towards a new way of life, adapting to a new culture, and learning more in the process. so, wish me luck.

i want to do well. i hope i will. its a new journey in life.

Teaching in cat high

2011-09-11T15:59:00.004+08:00

went back cat high as a physics relief teacher last month. and i must say it was one of the best periods in my life.

the reason why i hesitated before taking up the offer is cos i was afraid i would grow too attached to that place again, before leaving singapore. and i was right. i love giving the lessons, though i was bullied at times, i love talking cock with them in the library, or staying back to give remedial to them for their common MR. there are so many things i enjoyed doing back there.

even though i am glad to have finished o levels and a levels (and i wouldnt want to take them over again), i really miss being a secondary school kid myself. seeing the students in a classroom mixing and interacting with each other, dressed up in that very uniform i wore for 4 years, makes me feel really nostalgic. i am going to university next month, and i havent gotten used to this fact. if i didnt serve NS, didnt go back and teach, i would have been all ready for uni. that was how i felt right after JC, all boosted up and ready to work for my degree.

seriously, i wish i were one of the students in the sec 3 classes that i teach. sitting in a classroom with my friends, and having lessons, staying back after school to slack at times. how i wish i can go back to that life. i need to look forward, not backwards. catholic high has once again given me the best memories, before i leave singapore. i need to look towards my future, work hard to achieve my aim, and leave the past behind.

im glad to have made friends with the students. i'm happy to receive teachers day gifts from some of them. thank you people, for making my life as a teacher so wonderful. and thank you to the teachers who have taught me in catholic high itself, for i am happy to be back to be able to spend time with u all again. its time, in less than 3 weeks, i would be leaving for the UK. after getting my BSc degree, i would be heading to get my PhD degree. its a long journey, it will be such a long time before i am back in Singapore again. it will be such a long time before i can totally catch up with my friends/students/teachers again. that's the sacrifice i have to make, if i want an overseas education.

2011-06-19T15:12:00.002+08:00

talking to some ppl really makes me want to vomit blood. especially when those people do not have any sense of urgency or just simply can't be bothered. sometimes i wonder why i should lower all my dignity and beg them to be more responsive or hurry up, because eventually its their lost, not mine. am i stupid to be doing all this?

or maybe sometimes i should just accept that there are different types of people in the world, people with varying levels of urgency, efficiency etc. i cannot expect the world to be perfect in every way. arghhh, ok shall go vomit blood now.

2011-06-12T17:44:00.002+08:00

when will all these ever stop? just when?

everything is mixed up, need someone to talk to.

why does happiness always seem so temporal to me... when the opposite seems to be permanent?

2011-06-12T16:43:00.001+08:00

"i am willing to suffer for 3 months in exchange for 3 days of your happiness."

infatuation? love? ...stupidity???

if i understood it, i wouldn't be putting question marks.

2011-05-31T22:16:00.002+08:00

ok so here i am again. funny how i feel its much more private blogging here than updating statuses on facebook, although only my 'friends' on fb are able to see my posts whereas everyone in the world is able to see what i post here. nevertheless i still chose this place as a platform for my thoughts. typing here once again (sorry i know i have mentioned this many times) reminds me of how i sat in front of the same laptop everyday 3 years ago just to blog. and again i can't help feeling how different i am now.

3 years ago my posts were very much centered on academic stuff, especially science and physics (xD), well i am still reading much on physics now, in fact i am reading Feynman's 'The Character of Physical Law' everyday while traveling to and fro my workplace. its a series of 6 lectures given at Cornell by Feynman. its really good. somehow i've stopped reading those books about fanciful theories like string theory etc, rather im reading about fundamental physics, law of gravitation and stuff but described in a much more different way. for those who know Feynman well enough will know his unique approach towards physics and his hatred towards formalism. its about reading fundamental stuff and their interconnections that i gained an even deeper insight into physics. all those conservation laws and stuff, they are all linked, as long as physics is not a complete subject, there will never be a few fixed 'axioms' that all laws can be derived from.

its really interesting, thats a great insight for me. the laws that are correct (as of now) can often be expressed in many different ways, with different interpretations, maybe even mathematically different, yet the consequences are exactly the same and theres no way to tell whether it is this or that way. that is true even for the law of gravitation, the first interpretation is the f = GMm/R^2 which is what we learn, and that is false cos einstein already disproved it. there is a field principle and also a minimum principle (objects travel through the path with minimum quantity (that i shall not talk about here)). and also when studying laws making derivations from them sometimes physicists discover new principles that are much more important and also wider than the derivation itself, it applies to more stuff. so the derivation shouldnt be taken too seriously, the principle itself is the serious stuff.

feynman was talking about the relationship of mathematics with physics when he wrote all that. really interesting. and also his idea of mathematics as simply reasoning so that this law can be linked to that and can lead to that etc. everything is connected by simply reasoning, and the language of reasoning can ONLY be conveyed by mathematics. and mathematics is the only language that can be used to express some laws, they are mathematical in character, end of story. to fully appreciated them u need to know mathematics.

wow just by mentioning physics i could type all that haha. anyway i wanted to say that now, after 3 years since i blogged frequently, my blog posts are about people and my experiences with them. and sometimes about army cos it really changed my life in some way. but looks like this post is back to physics again. haha anyway i shall stop here. time to sleep!

2011-05-30T22:19:00.002+08:00

i wonder who are the people who make up the 2-5 visits to this blog per day. even on days when i do not visit my own blog. 2 years ago, or rather 3 years ago, i have something to blog about almost everyday. now i have a million things to blog about, but i do not know where to start and whether i will ever finish if i start. i remember the days when i upload all the pictures from my phone enthusiastically, despite having to wait so long as they are in full resolution.

now we can 'blog' on facebook, in a much more convenient way, we can easily upload a maximum of 200 photos with a few clicks and then type a caption and 'blog' about each photo. gone are the days when we surf blogs and click on the links in the blogs which leads us to even more blogs! blogs do not provide as accurate an update of a person's life as compared to his fb page. on the wall of an enthusiastic fb user you can sometimes see him updating about his life almost every hour(!) and see how his friends' comments about them doing 'stuff' with him. you can see his responses (stupid or clever) to his friends' comments and see him engage in an intellectual battle, engage in casual discussions or anything, all over his wall. therefore not only do u get to know what he is doing these days, where he works/studies, who is his newest gf etc, u get to understand the thoughts going on in his mind as well.

fb is so convenient that it can be a rather dangerous platform as well. u simply type whatever that comes to your head and press enter and then it updates the walls of hundreds of your friends. everything happens too quickly for u to think before posting 'politically correct' stuff. i think fb accurately reflects a person's character unless his account is inactive or he is simply toooo careful.

and its all about inference, from all his casual comments and the pages he likes etc u can tell a lot about him. u can almost take a screenshot of a person's fb wall and use it for a...social studies source based question..?

talking abt fb i just got distracted and spent one hour on fb. so now i guess its time to sleep and i shall stop here. =)

当

2011-05-29T00:04:00.003+08:00

当山峰没有棱角的时候
当河水不再流
当时间停住日夜不分
当天地万物化为虚有
我还是不能和你分手
不能和你分手
你的温柔是我今生最大的守候

当太阳不再上升的时候
当地球不再转动
当春夏秋冬不再变化
当花草树木全部凋残
我还是不能和你分散
不能和你分散
你的笑容是我今生最大的眷恋

让我们红尘作伴活的潇潇洒洒
策马奔腾共享人世繁华
对酒当歌唱出心中喜悦
轰轰烈烈把握青春年华
让我们红尘作伴活的潇潇洒洒
策马奔腾共享人世繁华
对酒当歌唱出心中喜悦
轰轰烈烈把握青春年华

Utada Hikaru - First Love - Piano and Harmonica

2011-05-25T22:45:00.003+08:00

played this on valentine's day. is your first love still counted as a first love if the person does not reciprocate? anyway i want to dedicate this to the lonely guys out there on valentine's day. a bit too late to post here haha. but after all i've posted it to youtube and fb.

Once in a while
You are in my mind
I think about the days that we had
And i dream that these would all come back to me
If only you knew every moment in time
Nothing goes on in my heart
Just like your memories
How I want here to be with you
Once more

You will always gonna be the one
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Oh, don't say no
You will always gonna be the one in my life
So true, I believe i can never find
Somebody like you
my first love

Once in awhile
Your are in my dreams
I can feel the warmth of your embrace
And I pray that it will all come back to me
If only you knew every moment in time
Nothing goes on in my heart
Just like your memories
And how I want here to be with you
Once more
yah yah yah

You will always be inside my heart
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Please don't say no
Now and forever you are still the one
In my heart
So true, I believe I could never find
Somebody like you
My first love
oh oh

You will always gonna be the one
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Oh, don't say no
You will always gonna be the one
So true, I believe I could never find
Now and forever

2011-05-24T22:45:00.002+08:00

no i am not thinking too deeply. u are thinking too little. why can't u put a little bit of urself in my shoes and understand why i am trying to understand all these? why did u ask me to text u if i have something to spill/share and yet ignore me ultimately? as human beings its only right for us to reflect on all that is happening around us. pushing everything to fate or anything else highlights a disturbing level of ignorance. someday i'm going to show u why i think so deeply. i care about u, i trust u, that is why i chose to share all that with u.

2011-05-23T12:18:00.002+08:00

looking through my posts, i must say, forgive me for my grammar in all my posts. almost every post was done in a short time and with very fast typing, i spotted many mistakes haha. after all this is just a personal blog about my thoughts and feelings, as long as the message can get across in the shortest possible time, i'm not too concerned about grammar. now i'm wondering who visits this blog now after it has been dead for almost 2 years.

Panasonic Lumix LX5 Camera

2011-05-17T23:26:00.007+08:00

was recently trying to get a decent compact camera for taking pictures in the UK when i go over for my studies. read the reviews and stuff and found out just how much more there is to photography than i had previously imagined. got myself a Lumix LX5 with rather powerful manual functions that is simply too good for a compact camera and found myself experimenting with it non stop these few days. well here are some long exposure night shots.

a picture tells a lot, what you want the picture to tell is fully in your control, even if your camera is pointing towards the same direction, into the same scene, adjust the setting and suddenly, say, a city is bustling with activity. adjust the settings again and it becomes dull and frozen. i didn't realize that until now, it all depends on how u tell the story with the picture. they say a picture paints a thousand words, well, change the settings in a camera and you now change that thousand words u want to tell, within a few seconds...the beauty of photography... i'm impressed!

Reflections...leaving army...starting work...

2011-03-11T22:17:00.007+08:00

its been ages since i last posted. well most of the time i share my life on fb through the wall posts as it reaches out to more people, and i believe that most of the people do this as well instead of blogging.

but sometimes there are too many things to share, it needs to be blogged. i really had no time in the army, neither was i ready to blog after i leave the army cos i'm just so not used to it now.

WORK LIFE

i shall blog again today. my first week of work has just ended. i'm currently on research attachment at the Institute of Microelectronics under A*STAR as part of a pre-departure programme before i embark overseas for my studies. just by typing this post now brings me back to the past, when i used to blog everyday after school to share my thoughts and feelings, its good to reflect after each day and type everything out.

anyway working now is like going to school again, all of a sudden people around me talk about intellectual and technical stuff, i spend everyday studying and learning to some extend to acquire the skills needed to contribute in a research project.

A BIT ABOUT ARMY

i learnt a lot during the army, not talking about military skills, im talking about interacting with people of different backgrounds and getting to know them as friends. most of them are really great friends, they gave me a much wider perspective in life. and even before i have the time to reflect about my 2 years of army life now that i've left, i am learning so much within just this one week of work life.

so i feel i have to blog it out, there's just too much going on in my head. i've yet to really reflect about what i learnt from meeting new people in the army and here i am meeting another different group of people (from different countries) at work and broadening my already wide perspective in life.

army really brings out the best and worst of the people in different situations, and sometimes in the same situation. what i mean by same situation is like when u go outfield, and stay in a jungle for days and nights and u just feel like going crazy and u miss being at home or being in a city soo soooo soooooo much, some people show their true characters and turn crazy, become selfish etc. but thankfully the majority i met were friendly. despite being under such harsh conditions, they helped their buddies (including me) to carry things etc, and share food together. u get to know the true nature of ur friends when subjected to such harsh conditions. hence the bonding between us is built, and i miss this bonding. i definitely wun miss going outfield or being controlled by so many rules and regimentation of the army life, but i miss my friends like anything. and my bunkmates too. i miss the people in my unit. i miss walking around and greeting friends, or being greeted by friends around me. yea this is what i miss. people whom i used to consider gangsters etc turned out to be such great friends...u guys are really the best.

WORK LIFE AGAIN

so the above is really a very very brief experience in the army and i do not plan to evaluate everything. ok anyway as i said i met new and different types of people during work.

its really an abrupt change. i have never met both groups (army and workplace) of people in school before. in army most the people are those i used to think of as gangsters whereas those during work are ppl with PhD, PhD students, international people, and basically people dealing with intellectual and meaningful scientific stuff.

i am working on this is project which is briefly described here http://www.ime.a-star.edu.sg/html/re_bio8.html
in the middle of the images there is a 3d scanning micromirror. i am there to (hopefully) contribute to the design of a circuit through which an output voltage (sine wave etc) controlled by a software (hopefully contribute to the programming of the software as well) passes to actuators connected to the mirror to move them and control the mirror to focus the beam. its is a very small part of the project. right now working and learning from a German who has a Masters in Electrical Engineering and she ends her attachment with IME this month. i am splitting my time between learning and familiarising with the software and doing some lab testing of the circuit.

basically thats the idea. im doing a lot of learning and testing out. and Singaporeans are really the minority at work. most of the people come from china, and u have people attached to us from all over the world, german, france, africa etc. i went for a meeting two days back and i tot the meeting might be more efficient if conducted in chinese lol.

my supervisor is from hong kong and went to california to get his bachelors and masters, and back to hong kong for a phd and then worked in switzerland and japan and now he is in singapore. he will probably go somewhere else in the world to work after some time.

i learnt so much from both the german i'm working with and also my supervisor. my supervisor has such a unique view of life which is also unconventional, and i really like people who do not have mainstream taking and are not willing to stick to conventional. talk to these people make me learn more, and i eat lunch with them everyday. i learnt alot abt germany and many issues since from the viewpoint from a german, things that we take for granted may seem special to them and vice versa.

i really enjoy talking to them. learnt alot on both the techincal and theoretical parts of the project i'm working on, and also about life. it is really so enriching i feel i need to record down in this blog before i forget. so everyday i learn new things just like when i was studying and now i am reflecting and blogging. its really nice to meet all these different people during army/work.

and i am adapting to a new environment really fast, this is the first week i'm here and i am already learning so much and not depressed or at a loss. so i'm quite happy about that. the only thing is the travelling. each day it jams like hell, have to wait for 2 - 3 buses and mrts before i can board them. haiz, so much time wasted on meaningless transport.

anyway i feel super tired and need to sleep already. i shall stop here for now.

晴天何时到来

2010-06-06T17:13:00.004+08:00

晴天何时到来

原来蓝色的天面
一瞬间便失去了光线
曾经拥有的快乐早被摧毁
现在的世界只有灰

坚强得很久好疲惫
多想闭上眼沉沉地睡
默默地面对命运的残酷
死了心痛就没感觉

一天比一天憔悴
记不得幸福是什么滋味
无可奈何地等待
晴天何时到来

梦见发着光的天面
一瞬间又回到了从前
生命再次因阳光而灿烂
醒来后夜还是长夜

一天比一天憔悴
记不得幸福是什么滋味
无可奈何地等待
晴天何时到来
晴天何时回来

the above song was written by me (one quarter adapted from another song) to dedicate to a good friend who has leukemia (i shall not name who). it is indeed shocking to have heard such a news, and it makes me wonder why fate has been so cruel to u. u have faced many challenges throughout ur life, and each time u conquered them with strength and courage. each time u worked very hard to overcome all the obstacles that are presented before u to block ur path to success.

i feel very miserable for u, and have cried at night while thinking about how u're going to face all these. do know that u have my support, and i will do anything i can to see u well again, be it donating platelets, bone marrow, whatever. life will not be the same for u, it wun be the same for me either...

2010-02-02T22:36:00.003+08:00

Bei Pan 背叛 - Cao Ge (Piano and Harmonica)

its been ages since i've blogged...well, cos of the limited time i have due to NS commitments. i shall start with a song that i recorded today on the piano and harmonica, cos i found it really touching. for more details click on the youtube link to bring u to the video page and view the video description (in case u do not know how to do it). well i was just feeling very emo so i decided to play the song.

NS can really turn ur life upside down, whatever goals and achievements u strive to attain, u have to put aside. sometimes, u just have to turn urself into a zombie receiving all sorts of orders without question their meaning and the logic behind all those things u are asked to do and do and do. if u cant bare to spend ur time not doing anything about ur own goals in life etc, then u will be engaged in a battle between trying to squeeze out as much time as possible to prepare for ur own future, while at the same time doing what ur superiors want u to do, it becomes very stressful and frustrating and at times u just feel like exploding with too many things in ur head. or rather, I just feel like exploding. anyway i guess my blog will become totally active again after i ORD.

Brunei - Lakiun Camp

i just came back from brunei a couple of days back. and many of u all shld know that ive been there last oct to provide medical cover for the open JCC (jungle confidence course). this time i went there with my own unit 3SIR and i can guarantee the experience is much worse. well i do miss the people in lakiun camp and the environment, really happy to meet them. but things become very different with 3SIR over there as well. especially the regimentation part which always gives me a BIG headache. its really amazing, how an experience at the same place can be either very wonderful or very depressing, depending on who is there. the environment changes accordingly.

last year i had fun with the jcc people, everyone was nice to talk to. nobody throws their rank around etc. i got to make new friends, interact with more people, understand the lives of the people in the camp etc. this time, no doubt i still enjoy talking to the people there, but the experience is definitely not great. especially when i was f**ked so badly by my superior in front of everyone inclduing some riflemen etc, and shouted at so loudly, and being insulted, for one small error that i made during a PRACTICE SESSION.

other people can forget all the details and full steps in using medical equipment and not get scolded, while i can get screwed so badly (seriously even my own parents dun scold me that way) for one small thing that slipped off my mind. is that biaseness or what?! any conscious person who was observing the situation could tell it...

i do not respect people for rank, that i must emphasize...

in fact, one superior alone can totally screw up my whole experience in brunei. cos of the control and power he is granted because of the arrows and one crab on the chest in front of his shirt, and the ability of him to exploit it.

forget it, i hope i will be talking about happy stuff the next time i blog.
ok, there were the happy moments in brunei...

CHSCO 10th Anniversary Celebration!!!

2009-11-20T14:53:00.002+08:00

today is catholic high chinese orchestra's 10th anniversary celebration! in the evening at 6.30pm. held at CHS MPH with buffet dinner plus a bit of performance! really cant wait to go there! it surely is gonna be very fun and exciting. its been sooooo long since there's a proper gathering for the CO people, seniors, juniors, old boys, teachers, everyone!!! mingyao, caichen, freddie, pohchoon and me are going, and im sure many more from my batch are going too. and i can go see the juniors and even my seniors whom i've not met for sooooo long. cos even when i go back on normal practice days i also can't see them around. its almost 3pm now. im setting off at 6pm. really can't wait! haha. =)

今生最大的福气

2009-11-15T21:20:00.003+08:00

当我烦恼时，你都会在我身边听着我诉苦。
当我沮丧时，你也会在我身边安慰我，鼓励我。
当我孤独时，你又会在我身旁陪伴我。
因为你，我也对自己有更深刻的了解。
日子一天一天地过了，我也习惯有你在身边的生活。
当我想跟身边的人说你的好时，才发现除了你，再也没有人更了解我，更会体谅我。
这段日子里，都是你在听着我说自己跟别人相处的每一个细节。
当我想告诉别人自己跟你相处的日子时，又发现除了你，也已经没有人能听我说这么多了。
我后悔以前不珍惜这个缘分，也责骂自己把这份友情当成理所当然，更恨自己不需要你时便把你抛在一边。
我现在的心情实在杂乱，也不知如何是好。
至少我终于了解到，有你这个朋友，是我今生最大的福气...

Back to selarang...

2009-11-15T14:32:00.003+08:00

its been a really long time since ive blogged, and an almost equally long time since i've been at selarang camp. i am booking into that place tonight, and ive almost forgotten how to go there. more than a month back i was at nee soon camp, and 3 weeks back i was in brunei.

the experience in brunei was really great, though got a lot of sai kang, and the jungle was crazy, ultimately i had a lot of satisfaction. i'll forget the few days in the jungle, crossing river in the rain, walking through the terrain that is barely for any beings to walk through at all, i did this with only one lieutenant and3sg signaller (nsf). if we got washed down by the strong current in the river, or slide down the 'valley', i wonder how are we going to go back. so there was no talk about rank or tekan all that, just 3 of us trying to get out of the jungle and...survive the trip?

thats the way NS should be, though there was a lot of physical suffering in terms of falling down every now and then and getting pricked, and with our legs shivering with the amount of load, we were happy at the end of the day cos we have been through it together, it was definitely a great experience.

i was away from 3 SIR when i was in brunei, made many many frens easily, including many regulars, be it CPT or SSG etc in the SAF camp in brunei. it was very much like a singapore camp, just that its super old and there is no such thing as 2nd storey, and 80 people stayed in our bunk? haha. the jungle was crazy, i can safely say u dunno what a jungle is like till u enter brunei. tekong's vegetation, as compared to the jungle in brunei, can be described as a 'garden' haha! well, its a pity such a good experience came to an end within 16 days.

rest and recreation (R and R) at Brunei was about mosques and sultan and their markets and visiting their shopping centres. people who do not appreciate any culture is gonna find it to be really boring. i remembered there was once when the bus stopped at the museum, 80% of the people didnt want to get down and simply remained there while we tour the musuem! i got down of cos, it was a once in a lifetime chance to enter...

well, after coming back from brunei was the one week break for me, i claimed 3 offs and took 2 leave. i learnt a lot during this week as well, and had many many new experiences. having been through all of these...i wonder how i am gonna adapt back to life in selarang camp...haizzz...7 more hours to leaving home... =(

Reflections...

2009-10-19T21:44:00.015+08:00

i've not blogged for a really loooooooong time, since im enjoying a few days of advanced off (due to my upcoming brunei trip which will burn many many weekends), i shall take this opportunity to spill some thoughts. and its bcos i have so many offs at one go that i actually had time to sit back at home to think through and reflect on my experiences all these while.

the past 2 weeks were spent in Nee Soon camp, cos my whole battalion moved there for AARM (Asean Armies Rifle Meet) 2009 which is held at Nee Soon live range and Mandai range and our own camp is at Selarang. Our unit is involved in the event.

Nee Soon camp still leaves me with the most memories, i learnt alot throughout my medic trainee days, and now my 3 SIR days as a medic. we stayed at the engineers training block, quite far from the medical institute block...it feels so weird to book in each time and turn the other way for the engineers block and not the medical block, and i never fail to just stare at the medical block while i book in...there are too many good memories left behind when i passed out from there.

other than going back to the medical block every so often to look for people i know, there were many new experiences, somehow i always had the most experiences here in this camp. yes, some can be life changing depending on how u look at it.

one such experience was indeed life changing, i shouldnt go into deep detail. looking back at my previous post, i realize the 'more u gain, more u lose' phrase applies yet again, something that i have always only dared to dream and think about, suddenly became true, yet instead of blissfulness or joy, it left me with emptiness...perhaps even worse than that i've felt before.

have u ever asked urself, what if ur dream is fulfilled, something that u have desired has been attained, what will u do? u probably will say, 'oh yes! i'll feel soooo blissful and satisfied i can't ask for more, its enough, i dun wan anything else already...' well, think again, can u safely assume that it would happen? chances are, no...when ur dream is fulfilled, u try hard not to let it go, only to find out that the more u cling onto it, the further away it gets...at the end of the day, what have u gained? u have an additional load to hold on to now, rather than not having seen that dream fulfilled at all like in the past...

well, the above seems extremely emo and as though im discouraging everyone to pursue their dreams etc...it depends on what kind of dreams u have, and how u deal with the situation should it become fulfilled. as for me, i failed badly...for now. what has happened has happened, i find it hard to let it go...

its a wonder how things could've changed so much in such a short time. i could vividly remember the first few days when i entered my unit, 3 SIR, infantry... 80% of the men there had tattoos, and vulgarities were used like anything. i emo like hell, thinking that i will never adapt to this kind of environment. yet in the end, i adapted. in fact, one of my closest friends, has an extremely large tattoo, and has beaten up a guy before. he said he is my worst best friend, haha. without him, i wouldnt have adapted to this environment, he's remorseful, changed for the better, always helpful. he can even sacrifice his weekends for his friends...

its yet another wonder how a scholar and an ah beng could end up being such close friends. i could still remember the first few days when i knew him, i avoided him, tried not to talk to him, always tried to go for lunch alone, and when its book out time, i disappeared quickly. i started to talk more with those group of friends ive made, the few minority that was from jc, while avoiding his group of friends. yet he stood up and spoke up for me, and through him, i was able to take a closer peek into the world of so called ah bengs. i used to criticize his group of frens, 'this one chao ah beng, that one...etc etc......' yet his friends became my friends, and i began to say hi and wave to the people that ive once avoided.

the general opinion towards ah bengs needs to change...BUT, there is a negative side as well, there are ppl who indeed seemed to be wasting their lives away, and there are people who seemed to despise people who can study, who show an apparent biasness against people like me. these are the people that i will ignore.

having said all that, its easy to test how much my fundamental interests have changed...my collection of physics books is increasing by the day. put a textbook in front of me, can be physics, chemistry, math etc, and the excitement is still there. the urge to open the book and finish it is there. my journey thorugh the world of physics is still ongoing...

well i shall stop here. anyway guys, im leaving for BRUNEI on 22nd OCT, 2am...will be back on 7th NOV around midnight. see ya guys man...

2009-08-02T00:49:00.002+08:00

these few days have been rather traumatic. something is missing from my life, or i would say a lot of things are missing. i've finally understood the meaning of this phrase - the more u gain, the more u lose...

when you're in possession of a lot of things, you are forced to protect them, to ensure that they are always in your possession. losing any of them can be a miserable experience. at times, you hope that you never owned any of the missing items, then you wouldn't have felt anything about them at all... the feeling is worse when u spend time with them, trying to improve and upgrade them, only to lose them in the end. knowing how easy it is to lose the item, u start asking yourself, is it worth it to gain possession of a similar item again? would u risk it? when i talk about items, i dun mean objects only, they can be people, relationships, material or non-material.

i got to understand another thing as well. some dreams will always remain as dreams, its useless to fool yourself into believeing that a dream has come true, only to discover that the exact opposite is true. miserable as it sounds, some dreams ought to be given up completely.

if i have a calendar-like tool that could erase certain days that i've lived through, i certainly have a few days in mind. these were the days i gained possession of things that i treated to be so precious, and yet lose them totally. i wish i could turn back time to a period before i gained such things, or rather, before such things were introduced to me. i dun want memories of these things, especially things that i've treated to be most important in my life. if i hadn't gain such things, how am i supposed to even know that they are my most precious possessions and i've lost them?

it was a wrong choice to turn up on that very day...or am i wrong...?

though this post has nothing to do with the scholarship that i've just gotten, i must say that some happenings in life have made me feel more empty than before i've even gotten the scholarship, though most people believe that the opposite is true.

A*STAR Scholarship Award Ceremony

2009-07-27T18:38:00.010+08:00

i am having a high fever right now and thus on mc, and my mum's temp was 39.1 today so i guess i spreaded the virus to her! my plan was to write my uni application essay asap but looks like i just cant get it done. so i'll just blog. i received my a*star scholarship on friday during the ceremony, after many rehearsals which burned my saturdays (well i dun mind at all haha).

this ceremony was held at Matrix building's level 2 auditorium in Biopolis, A*Star.

DREAM SCHOLARSHIP?

looking back a year ago, i remember myself longing very much for this scholarship. i'll stare at the a*star brochures and visit the a*star website just to go to the scholar's page and admire the scholars...that was what i did during my break from studying. i'll stare at their universities and wonder how nice it'll be if i could study physics at one of them and eventually get myself a phd and pursue a research career in the area im most passionate in.

there were a lot of ups and downs, so many things have happened during my jc years. i worked hard and steadily, and i still remember how i pulled through my a levels. it was indeed stressful, i can still recall vividly how i woke up at 4am to study, and at times sleep at 2am. that night before a level chemistry and econs paper (together on the same day), i slept at 3am and woke up at 4am!!! i wonder how i managed to pull through that. haha. i received help and encouragement from teachers. and of course, there was this conduct grade incident which i will always remember.

THE INTERVIEWS

i was happy my a level grades meant that i was eligible for the scholarship. and, unlike many others, the only scholarship i applied for was a*star. i mean, which other scholarship can allow me to pursue my passion in a research intensive and international environment and to groom me into a phd holder??? there are many scholarships which allow me to take physics, but those are not what i want. so if i dun get this scholarship i would stay in singapore to study physics, and somehow try to get a phd scholarship eventually.

before being shortlisted for the interview, i had to write a 1500 word essay to describe why i wanna choose Physics and the things i've done to show my interest in science and r and d. i thought i was impossibly difficult but turns out i wrote a 2100 words essay and i had a hard time trying to eliminate some words!!!

Round ONE interview was by three scientists, one from institute of materials research and engineering, one from institute of microelectronics and one from data storage institute. they are research scientists, not professors or assoc profs. its quite natural for them to interview me since i put my choice as physics. when asked about what i know about a*star and where i wanna work in, i mentioned exactly the 3 institutes they were from and they were laughing. so coincidental haha! so i guess they knew i did my research and what kind of research a*star's institutes do has that require physics.

as i talked alot about Einstein and his relativity theory, one of them actually asked me what did Einstein win the nobel prize for, expecting me to answer relativity??? hehe. i remembered the 3 scientists shooting questions at me one by one. and at times before one could finish his question the other starts to cut in. they just want to make sure that u really and sincerely want to pursue a phd and are keen on a research career.

the interview with the chairman Mr Lim Chuan Poh was quite an experience as well. he's a very sharp guy and as u all may have already known he was the ex chief of defence force, lieutenant general (3 star), so it is normal he asked me how i ended up as a combat medic. lol. i remembered talking to him about the conduct thing and what i've done and i was just being honest haha. and after that i thought his facial expression changed and i have screwed it up big time. he was with the director of A*star graduate academy and director of Science and Engineering research council as well, all of which i've seen before (photos i mean), so i was already expecting these 3 faces on the day of the final interview itself.

THE CEREMONY

i was overjoyed when i received the email saying that i was offered the scholarship after all. and now this day has come, after so many rehearsals. and they update the website fast. right after i went home from the ceremony our faces were already on the website. both on the main page congratulating us and also in the class of 2009 scholars. its a joy visiting it and seeing my face together with all the other faces. and the award ceremony was a memorable one as well. there were 40 plus new scholars and also the phd scholars who were themselves recipients of the bachelor of science scholarship 4 years ago. those were the faces i recognise straightaway cos i've always been staring at their photos on the brochures and also in the a*star roll of honour. it feels so great to be able to go on the same stage as them to receive the award, now that im part of the family in a*star. i must thank a*star for giving this opportunity to me and will definitely cherish it and make full use of it. i can't wait to go university right now!

this was a moment i have long awaited for, receiving award from the minister for trade and industry. my favourite photo haha.

the minister giving his speech

the above photo shows the NSS-BS scholars after taking a photo with the a*star chairman, directors and the minister. we were already going off from the stage already, my dad must've missed it haha. anyway the picture below shows the photo taken by the professional photographer, and i believe it must have been edited. its on the a*star website but the size is pathetic cos they have to save the server space.

the photos above and below shows the performance our group has put up during the ceremony. its a chemistry lesson skit and midway through the lesson the teacher used a very unique way to teach everyone about the periodic table. if u have heard the elements song u'll know whats going on. its a spoof of the video on youtube and basically after every element is called in the song we pluck out something behind the boards that make up the periodic table to reveal the element. haha.

ok the video below shows the original elements song

periodic table fully revealed... i am behind the nitrogen, oxygen, phosphorous and sulphur board. the square board at the back (right)

the teacher doing the talking

the dance performance

THE FINALE SONG - HEAL THE WORLD

we chose 'heal the world' to sing for our finale song and i think its really touching and suitable. throughout all the rehearsals and preparations and meetings we had before the actual ceremony, we have bonded in some way or another, even for an introverted person like me. hence, coming together to sing a song is a perfect conclusion to this ceremony. after all we're future colleagues! at least i've started to appreciate all the rehearsals and stuff as it makes this ceremony a more memorable, though i used to hope that we can just come up and receive the award and go off. in the first pic above we were snapping fingers and waving light sticks.

putting hands on shoulders...

waving sticks again, this time higher.

AFTER THE CEREMONY

after the ceremony i met with my parents outside the auditorium and i actually met Mr Chan (HCI Vice Principal). i was so happy la and he could recognize me! yay. haha. he's the vp who studied in catholic high in the past. i'm happy he was invited to this event and i chatted with him in his office a few times. a few other ex Hwa Chongians were chatting with him and i actually met one guy whom i found out to be the author of an article sharing his experience with A*Star interviews and his advice on getting the scholarship! before each interview i MUST read his article to refresh myself on his tips and to try to expect what would happen during the interview. now i'm seeing this guy in person during the award ceremony as a scholar, its a really wonderful feeling. the article written by him is here http://tjchighed.pbworks.com/Scholarships+-+A*STAR

haha the above photo shows me standing beside the congratulatory ad A*Star has put up to congratulate the scholars. the photos of us inside are taken by professional photographers and they had such a hard time getting me to smile lol.

two guys from rj that i made friends with

when we were moving off already, i saw the chairman downstairs so we quickly took a photo with him and we had a quick chat.

this scholarship is a beginning of a new adventure in life, to pursue my passion in a leading overseas university with amazing facilities and lecturers. after which i will come back for a year of ressearch attachment before embarking on phd studies in yet another university. by then i'll be rich with experiences and even after studying there's a wonderful career to look forward to. part of the bond can be serve in the universities (NUS and NTU) as a lecturer and academic positions can be held there as well. the future is definitely exciting!!!

but first, i have to ord...haha.

HCI Awards Ceremony 2009

2009-07-19T01:01:00.014+08:00

ok let this post be a morale booster. it reminds me that i have a beautiful and successful civilian life out there. it reminds me that im not given a rank in the civilian world and im appreciated as a person with a passion and individual intersts and goals.

i was awarded the outstanding student award and my 7 dist award and the 7 dist plaque was given to me first (not on stage) and so i only proceeded to the stage once (for time saving purposes i guess) to receive the outstanding student award which is some sort of a medal. the cert for the outstanding student award was given to me before the ceremony as well. haha i felt that the plaque should be the one presented on stage, it is bigger and nicer when looked from far (eg in a photograph took below the stage). but the medal is really very very nice when looked closely. its so shiny and golden and heavy.

the above is the front of the medal. this is the original colour of the medal. the first few pictures at the start of the post show that it's somewhat silver but its actually fully gold.

this pic shows how shiny the medal is. u can actually see my camera's reflection in it! even the back of the medal is nicely decorated.
imagine if only the carving on the medal is not that of a hci building, but of alfred nobel!!! that would be sooooo nice!!!

please dun get it wrong the above medal is not mine!!!

its only until i really sit down in the auditorium and lt3 with my classmates and see my teachers in front that i realize how much i actually miss this feeling - the feeling of being in school, the feeling of being in hci. i used to miss the feeling of being at secondary school cos we are generally given more attention and focus by the teachers, and in jc u have to be more independent. but after going to the army, i finally know whats 100% independence, to the extent that u must know how to defend yourself when a situation goes wrong for u. being able to sit in a lecture theatre with ur teachers in front of u doing all the talking is an ultimate luxury, though some students think of it as a torture. my advice to these people is to choose subjects that they are really passionate about to take. and you'll feel as if u are watching a performance during a lecture cos u love the subject so so much and someone is talking about it in front.

we went to report in lt3 for some briefing before proceeding on to the auditorium. and the lt and audi atmospshere all felt too familiar. we talked about army and stuff. though its not that long since we last met (cos we just had an outing last weekend), the feeling here is different cos its back at the very place where we studied. kk i shall share the pics taken.

the stage, the emcees, the awards...

spot me above!

principal's adresss...

principal showing off about HCI scholars dominating A*Star Scholars Honours list...lol.

me going up the stage to collect my medal.

my faourite pic showing the whole atmosphere with me and my medal.

jia qiang and me. on our way home we met at the parade square so we took a picture.

part of my family and me!

haha i look like a salesman who just successfully sold a car to someone. LOL.

as i've said, this award ceremony will serve as a morale booster and i am constantly being reminded of 'hey, this is my life!' when im seated down at the auditorium with my fellow schoolmates. i am an individual with my own achievements and awards. i hope my confidence in myself will be back to the fullest again. anyway, hc is a place with a strong alumni association so we wun lose contact with it.

lost...

2009-07-14T13:44:00.004+08:00

i realize i'll be away from home for 10 years, 2 due to ns (though there're weekends but i always feel as if i book in as soon as i book out, weekends sure pass fast). the next 8 years will be due to studying overseas, well that was my choice...well anyway...i am blogging because i'm somewhat depressed.

well i have an off today and when i was told suddenly that i've to book in by 5pm today i was totally lost, cos i thought i could at least sleep another night at home today. i mean i was writing my uni app essay halfway and suddenly an sms just came saying i have to be back, meaning i have to leave house by 3pm!

next is the feeling of lost and a bit of sadness when i was informed of this fact. i do recall feeling abit sian during the book in days in bmt and bmc. but it was never that sian. i associate such feelings with a few things that have happened in this camp, which i dun wish to elaborate (im not allowed to anyway). well...counting down to book in time is probably the most depressing moment for nsfs...

i have beautiful dreams, often i dream of being able to start my university life at the age of 19, right next month. often, i stare at the new university physics text that ive bought last year, right beside me, on my table, when i'm at home. yet i know i can't concentrate fully on studying it, due to the amount of things i've to settle during weekends, and because of the fact that i stay in camp, which is an ultimate inconducive environment for studying. i look at my untouched books, my unfinished essay and countles many other things. and wish that i can just take a month off to settle everything.

the stressful and miserable moments i've felt recently can also be linked to the fact that at the same time while serving the nation, i am fighting for every little bit of free time i can possibly fight for, to study, to read, to ensure i dun lose touch with physics, yet i dun wan to lose touch with my friends out in the civilian world either. though i know the root behind all these feelings, im still stressed. i've high expectations of myself. i dun wan to waste any time, esp when it has become so precious now that im in the army.physics is a subject that requires much thought and concentration. lose a bit of concentration and u would not be able to master any concept.

finally is the feeling of leaving my house. its very very bad. to unlock the door and step out of it, knowing that u wun be back for at least a few days, is very sad. resting at home, or walking in the streets in town or walking in a shopping centre has become one of the greatest luxuries i can ever enjoy.

Medic POP...

2009-06-07T16:52:00.004+08:00

i'm going to miss SMTI - BMC (basic medic course) like hell... and i still can recall how everyone complained that we have to stay here for 11 weeks when we were here for out first week. and now, nobody wants to leave at all. and i already play the medic song for like 100 times on my com.

anyway, i'll just upload a few photos for now. videos and more photos will come later. im posted to Selarang Camp in TAMPINES!!! means that for the next 1 year 8 months im gonna travel all the way there arghhhh. Infantry some more, 3 SIR is my new unit. gone are those days in nee soon camp, 6 mins from my house, and somewhere i really really look forward to booking in to each sunday.

i'll never forget u guys...

jasper, yongsheng, hengky, nabil, kin mun, sgt royston, sgt abu zar, zi qiao, me, victor

me and superstar buddy Adriano

me and my best friend in BMC tian kian! arghhh why did i look away from the camera!!!

yongsheng trying to get dinie in out photo. lol.

thats much better =)

screwed photo, me, jeremy, ming lun, adriano

my platoon in the parade

us performing medics warcry!

random...lol...

I LOVE BMC!!!

2009-05-30T18:36:00.002+08:00

went back to hci and chs yesterday. talked to a few teachers and the cleaner auntie in chs as well. somehow i think im kinda detached from the academic world or school life. watching the students attend their lessons is really a weird thing. school feels really unfamiliar and its hard to believe that i myself was attending the lessons just a year ago. and the feeling when i stepped into chs is different as well. i just got to get used to being in a school shld i enter it again.

what i could identify with was surprisingly the POP of the NCC ppl in chs. i used to not understand uniform groups at all, and i wonder why ppl join uniform groups. many times, i dun even bother to take a look at them.

the picture above shows the NCC POP in CHS yesterday. i could understand all the commands, and it was the most familiar thing that i saw in CHS yesterday. weird eh...
anyway i met up with some juniors, and saw some of them as well. other than that i got nothing much to blog about already.

i have a lot of things undone and im quite stressed now. and i really dun wanna spend my two years in NS doing just NS...first is reading up, next i wan to do some work that i could keep for future reference, or that i can let others read. kk nvm i just got alot to do. weekends aren't enough. once i enter a unit and when my NS life is really stabilized im going to bring stuff in to do.

Memories...5 More Days to POP

2009-05-29T08:30:00.002+08:00

i can remember with great fondness my time spent in both BMT and BMC (basic medic course). if u have asked me if i wanted to go to NS before jan 28 (my enlistment date), i probably would have said no. but if u pose the same question to me now, i would say, without hesitation, a firm yes. at least, i know i want to go through both BMT and BMC, whether or not i would enjoy NS after passing out of BMC is another issue.

i made a lot of close friends during this period of my life. and i remembered how much i miss my BMT bunkmates when i entered BMC, yet within a few weeks, im already as close to them as i am to my BMT bunkmates. i've said before, that somehow the process of making friends is greatly accelerated in NS, as compared to those in school.

possible reasons for this include the fact that we are staying together in the same cosy bunk everyday. also, the number of bunkmates we have, as compared to that of a class, is much smaller. especially for an introverted person like me, speaking up in front of a large amount of people is difficult. so in BMT and BMC, i'm able to make friends with my small number of bunkmates first and then move on to those in my platoon. of course, we go through every single thing together. we eat the same food, wear the same attire, sleep at almost the same time.

now, im 5 days away from POP. and im hoping the day wouldnt come. i remembered that when i first entered BMC, i thought it was a 9 weeks course and it changed to 11 weeks. so everyone was like wth 11 weeks? how to survive. we all wanted to leave that place asap. yet now we know we are dreading POP. and for me, im treasuring every moment in camp now. i won't feel sad if we dun get to bookout early, or have nights out every week.

think about it this way, in future, even if u want to book in to camp and stay with all your bunkmates again, you will not even get a chance. whereas u will get to spend all ur time in the civilian world after u ORD. so, is the time spent in camp with all ur frens more precious, or the time u get to spend in the civilian world?

its true that we may suffer at times. esp when we are punished in SBO under the hot sun, really feel like dying. there may be unreasonable commanders, this is the same everywhere. but what is important is the things we gain after going through all these...kk, after POP i will be able to upload some pictures of the parade, that is the only time we can bring a camera in.

HCI, CHS

today is the only non public holiday weekday that i will get to be out of camp. for vesak day off in lieu, i know thats quite long ago, but my camp is quite weird haha. so im going back to HCI to collect the A Level cert. and of course im going back to Catholic High as well. so there'll be a lot of memory recalling today haha.

its been a looooooooong time since i've stepped in Catholic High especially, and im going back on a weekday where all the sch activities are going on. and today is the last day of term 2 for all the juniors. everyone must be in a good mood. cant wait to talk to my teachers, both in HCI and CHS. im really glad. =) today is going to be a wonderful day! xD

2009-05-08T22:50:00.002+08:00

quite bored now...haha. somehow im not that excited about booking out like in the past, maybe i've really gotten used to army life, or my life in SMTI in particular. we used to go wild during nights out but now more than half the platoon do not book out during nights out. nights out means we are allowed to book out of camp from abt 6pm till 10.30pm. yesterday i went to yishun library during lights out, and i realized that i would have preferred to be in the camp with all the bunkmates, slacking or chatting other than rushing here and there and geting sweaty. maybe we all feel that we've been 'trapped' in a camp so much that if we dun go for nights out then its a waste, thats why even though there are ppl who say aiya nights out go where. most still would go so they wun waste the nights out.

but we tend to overlook the fact that after our POP (passing out parade) from SMTI (SAF Medical Training Institute), we will never get the chance to even visit this camp anymore.

life, like in bmt, is getting better by the day. ive gone through 7 weeks as a medic trainee and we've graduated from the civilian medic course, starting combat phase next week for another 4 weeks before POP. in fact POP is not a day i am eagerly looking forward to, cos i would have preferred to stay in this camp for even a few months after POP. the people here, and my bunkmates are generally nice, with the exception of a few ppl who are exceptionally nice, haha.

in fact, staying with a bunch of ppl all the time, esp now that they've become my good frens, really stop me from thinking abt personal problems and stuff. esp when sleeping at night with so many beds around u, somehow u wun emo that much and worry abt ur own stuff. so in a way it really helps to relieve a certain level of stress that i would have felt when alone, say, at home.

i have tonnes of stuff to blog abt, these few weeks far too many unique experiences already. but i think i will stop now. lots of stuff to settle after each bookout.

2009-04-09T17:50:00.002+08:00

INTRAVENOUS INFUSION (IV) TECHNIQUE

today we had an early bookout from camp. 3.30pm lol. and tmr is gd friday so its a long weekend and everyone was excited. well...we only did IV today and my vein was ruptured haha, on both arms. this happened to my buddy as well when i poked him the first time. =( so he got the vein successfully only at the third time. cant blame him also, my vein so difficult to find.

im almost an IV expert already haha. but its also bcos my buddy's vein is super easy to find, just poke and i reach it already, then got backflow of blood and all that. lucky i still can type with swollen arm haha. hmm, i remembered the first IV that i did, i was soooo scared though i never thought i was afraid of needles. i am NOT afraid of being poked, but just afraid of poking ppl. i was damn relaxed till when i finally held a needle in my hand, about to poke my buddy...

i sweat and sweat profusely. till my gloves were all wet, then i shivered and brought the needle forward. my buddy was just the other way round compared to me, he's scared of being poked, not afraid of poking ppl. so he shouted when my needle went in, and my mind went blank, i just poked right in and shivered till the needle came out. i apologised many many times, then poked again. more shouting, and i was more anxious. end result, the needle went right through the vein and it ruptured and there was a swell.

the swelling was crazy, today my arm also swell liddat. once the needle go in the swell will build up, u can really see it building up and u'll be scared trust me. so my first iv was really really screwed up, forgot a lot of things also, mind really went blank.

subsequent IVs (today was the third one) were perfectly ok. i dun shiver anymore, im so relaxed and i would say im used to poking ppl already.

CAMP AND BUNKMATES

army is really a brand new experience. i remembered missing tekong when i went in to nee soon camp, wondering how i can adapt to the new life here, looking at strangers all around me. and yet before adapting to tekong life, i really felt very lost cos i never went to army before (well obviously), and i never stayed in camp before. but in the end, i made such wonderful frens in tekong that we already had three outings since we graduated.

and same for nee soon camp. its been only 3 weeks, and i've adapted fully. in fact when i eat dinner at home now, i kind of long for queuing up for dinner in the cookhouse, with all my frens, and eating tgt. and also slacking in bunk after RO (routine order). its obvious i would miss nee soon camp saf medical training institute when i graduate from it. i was only in tekong for 5 and a half weeks. im going to be in nee soon camp for another 8 weeks, and i must treasure it.

somehow making frens is an easy process in the army cos we stay together. having the same experience in both army camps, i can conclude accurately that we make frens quickly here. well...compared to making frens in sch...much much more quickly. and it teaches u to be more independent. well at least now i feel that its better to have gone thru all these than to slack home. imagine going thru my whole life without experiencing staying in camp, marching as a platoon, staying with fellow trainees...learning to be independent...there's a lot to be missed.

maybe its life as a recruit, and now as a trainee, that i find fulfilling. cos we are learning things, we train tgt, and stay tgt with all our frens. when i graduated as a medic, i would have more freedom, higher rank, no longer be controlled and restricted as trainees, can eat lunch on my own, not as a platoon, dun have to fall in and count strength all the time. BUT, life may be boring, i may not make many new frens anymore, i may not stay with fellow trainees in bunk, and may not learn stuff everyday anymore., life may become a boring routine. in that case, i will wish i can ORD immediately and leave NS. but i have no choice, i am in a medical training institute now, and its only right that i serve after graduating from this school, utilising my skills.

well, life after graduation is still uncertain. bcos if i have to spend my next one and a half years doing nothing but on standby throughout other ppl's training, i would definitely find it boring. theres no more learning and interaction...i hope it wun be this way...

SAF Medical Training Institute

2009-04-03T18:47:00.002+08:00

k im posted to SMTI for training to be combat medic, since last week monday i've been there for an 11 weeks course. time is tight now so i only have time to blog a bit, got to book back in at 10pm for guard duty (not punishment). first, i would say that i've adapted well to the environment. same thing, first day i felt very sad and i wonder how i'm going to adapt and know everyone, but as time passes so quickly, im now kinda enjoying life there already.

the PT is quite xiong, cos combat medic is diff from service medic, its a Pes A and B vocation though im in Pes C, only got 4 pes c in my platoon of 64 ppl. combat medic has to carry rifle and everything plus stretcher and medical oderly pouch (MOP) and chiong. so PT is 4.5km roughly, and 800m more for slower runners, and yet another 800m more for even slower runners, esp those who walked in the back. then its 60 pushups and 60 crunches, or 110 counts of 4 squatt bender!!! lol. and training is progressive, sergeants says this is only the starting...

life's not bad really. have quite a number of things to talk abt, and in case u dunno, we have to give IV (intravenous infusion technique aka poke the vein and put drip) to our buddies 10 times to pass the course. 10 successful times. means its roughly u have to be poked 30 times liddat if on average u miss 2 times each.

i got two successful ones already, and have given 2 successful ones also. haha. kk i shall go now. will blog abt it next week ba, got long weekend cos of gd friday. times is really really tight today...

Old Catholic High Building!!! (queen street)

2009-03-20T00:14:00.008+08:00

went to plaza sing and cathay today, k but thats not the main point. i was on my way from cathay to national library, with my junior, and he was telling me that the old cat high building is very near to us, and part of it has been turned into a museum. i was like, 'sure or not???' and i really feel bad abt now knowing the school's history properly man. but heres something to learn...

stepping into this building which i've seen in pictures describing cat high's history is really an exciting experience.

this (above pic) was the first view of the building that i've seen while walking, below is a closer look of it and u see the words "sino-english catholic school" on it, it was the original name of catholic high. the building is old and has been sealed up for many many years, the gate to this building is locked.

very old building, u can imagine every student rushing throught this very building for lessons, in the 1950s...in the two pictures below u see this very building right at that time (picture taken from a different angle if u didn't realise), i got this from the Catholic High Alumni website. the building is still standing right here, not demolished or anything, and it has not been turned into anything else. its still in the same state. its really good to see it today, and to compare it to old pictures.

really makes me wonder how life would be like back then at this very building. i long to go back in time and study there for a few months haha.

the classroom doors...

pic taken from behind the building. the windows are weird lol.

me standing in front of the church (former catholic high building too)

this building seems very familiar and the moment i see it i know that yes i am indeed standing right in front of the old queen street building, if u read the history of catholic high there's always this picture showing students assembled in front of this church building. i never knew i could really get to see the same building haha. i believe that the place where i was standing was the former parade square of the school. its like our new clock tower. now that its been turned into a church u can see ppl inside offering prayers.

these pictures show the sign at the old buiding. notice how our new building (for chs readers) resembles the old building, the pilars and stuff. and the 'sino-english catholic school' sign was put up in the new compound a year ago, exactly like this one. now the reason for putting that sign becomes clear eh.

door to a classroom

the above is a picture taken from beside the church. look at the new orange building that is in front of the church, i took it that way to show its position relative to the church. its the former catholic high primary, and has recently been turned into part of the Singapore Arts Museum.

for a closer look at the museum u can take a look at the picture below.

look carefully at the pictures above and below. look at the parts circled by me. if u notice the two pillars that i circled had been the gate to enter the school, they are not demolished. the circled pillars in both pictures are the same pillars that has stood there for more than 50 years...

Catholic High School, circa 1956 (Photocredit: National Archives of Singapore)
notice the policemen in their old uniform, and also the very very old type of street light.

Catholic High School, No.8 Queen Street. circa 1954 (Photocredit: National Archives of Singapore) again i circled the pillar.

Courtyard, Catholic High School, circa 1956 (Photocredit: National Archives of Singapore)

the article below talks about the opening of the art museum.

8Q sam is Singapore Art Museum’s new wing for contemporary art. Both the main museum building and the new 8Q building were originally built to serve as schools. 8Q sam was the former Catholic High Primary School. Read more at 8Q sam.
It’s approximately “88 steps” from the Singapore Art Museum (SAM), but the new wing, 8Q, is expected to go the distance for contemporary art. Revamped to the tune of $6 million, the former Catholic High School building along Queen Street will open tomorrow night with the group show 8Q-Rate: School. The exhibit will feature new works by eight artists working with eight curators on the theme of “school”. The works will include a range from urban pop art to installation to video to sound from artists such as Donna Ong, Tan Kai Syng, Jason Wee, Chong Li-Chuan and the phunkstudio design collective.

compare the picture above and below... the pic below is a photo album cover for catholic high in the 1950s...

Outing with Bunkmates again!

2009-03-18T22:44:00.004+08:00

xan, me, shane, kumar and gerard (chris and janson left already)

this time we played pool at park lane (very near the cathay), lazy to write and write for now.

xan with my cool glasses

introducing Hancock...

Physicist

2009-03-18T00:10:00.000+08:00

who says there are no physicists in singapore? it depends on the research area only. finally, this occupation appear in the list already. xD

NUS Open House / Future Plans - and Physics! =)

2009-03-17T17:18:00.002+08:00

WARNING!!! this post is 4111 words long! its a compilation of a lot of thought and sorting out of my goals and perspectives etc. i have everything sorted out already and i must record it down in a post for future reference and to further sort my thoughts out coherently. i paid minimal attention to grammar as well as to present everything elegantly cos my aim was to spill everything out in the shortest amount of time. it took me three days to complete. its an important process in life cos i'm deciding what to do in future. i wonder why i dread a 1500 words essay for scholarship application when i willingly talked abt my goals and everything related to it in 4111 words...

after chatting with the Physics professor today i conclude that Physics is an absolutely die die MUST GET degree for me!!! am really happy these days cos ive finally sorted out my thoughts and cleared my last doubts. i know wad i wan in life and wad to be my hobby and passion and career. all these are sorted out theres a clear path ahead. =)

went for NUS open house and the trip was definitely worthwhile! went there mainly to get to know more about the different courses (science in particular and also engineering), of course i do consider NUS as one of the universities to enter. hence my aim was to know what exactly the different types of engineering are about and of course, what are the career prospects (esp research) of a Physics major and also what exactly is being taught in it (though i know a lot already) and how it is being taught.

PHYSICS!!!

NUS's brochure for Physics and its dept, its various labs and centres are shown on the right

I sound excited in my post title, cos i am! i can't wait to study Physics in uni immediately and i wish i can do so right away, like tomorrow! i went to NUS wanting to listen to the science and engineering talks and i did. but i realise that after the talks when i went to the Physics booth i couldn't leave it.

today's experience was definitely enriching. the best thing was that i got to chat with a few Physics majors as well as Physics professors, and i went on talking with a professor for about two hours! he told me to address him by his name and gave me his email and number and also office location, so i can look him up whenever i have any queries. this is fantastic! xD

i realise that the faculty of science booth is not extremely filled with people, esp when u compare it to medicine booths etc, which is quite natural since most people in singapore considers a science degree to hold very limited career prospects. this is not true, especially if you're getting a Physics degree. =)

its difficult to come across people who are really into Physics so much that they will aim for a degree in this area, none in my HC or CHS class...and even in my H3 Physics class theres only abt 4 if i remembered correctly, so its very rare. its even harder to find people who read up regularly on the subject. in fact, people who dunno me and my passion well (particularly my pri sch classmates cos i have not discovered this burning passion back in pri sch...well...) are often shocked and surprised that i wan a Physics degree, and many thought that i 'resort' to taking such a degree cos im not qualified for other degrees. it all depends on the passion.

hence i find talking abt my passion in front of most people to be difficult bcos most dun understand wad im talking abt. i talk abt the wonders of mathematics being able to describe physical phenomena as a universal language and relativity and quantum and most simply nodded their heads or switch off completely. so i really would love a conversation with Physics majors and professors.

i first talk to this professor who graduated from Australian National University (reknowned for research and its sci dept) abt his perspectives on Physics and getting a degree on the subject and he introuduced me to a Theoretical Physicist (general relativitist) right here at NUS, who told me abt what he does here.

A CHAT WITH A TRUE BLUE THEORETICAL PHYSICIST

i searched for him online and found his research area: General relativity, quantum field theory and string theory. Classical and quantum properties of black holes, particularly within the framework of string or M-theory. Quantum field theory in curved space-time, quantum inequalities and negative energy densities.

so there are theoretical physicists working right here at NUS, i always thought there aren't really people who are just working on theory alone cos i always come across (in NUS) researchers researching on things like quantum optics and other stuff that has practical applications, not things that are merely concerned with how the universe is formed and the laws govering it or questioning what exactly it is made of. this professor is Assoc Prof Edward Teo and he really does what theoretical physicist like michio kaku does, sit in a room and scribble equations all day, and he doesnt enter a lab to do work at all. so its really highly mathematical. of course, he has teaching duties and he has discussions with students as well.

he told me that its impossible for singapore to like support 20 string theorists or general relativists but one or two is fine. yea so u get the idea. haha im not really aiming for a theoretical physicist position in NUS or anywhere else, cos i've thought about it in great detail these few months, though i must say im still fascinated about theoretical physicists and i respect them deeply, for their perserverance and undying passion and their intellectual ability and analytical skills and much much more.

i asked myself what i really want to do, and of cos the idea of a career that must be related to Physics remains, bcos i am passionate about the subject and pursuing my passion in my career is one of my main goals in life, and something everyone shld adopt, instead of aiming for money or fame. but the question is what type of physicist do i want to become? do i really want to work with equations all day, and work with theories and more theories for intellectual fulfilment. yes, im fascinated with theories and no doubt i will continue to follow its latest developments and watch videos of my most respected theoretical physicists doing the talking.

but i have decided on a research career that is more of application, something that allows me to be in work in the laboratories of the best research institutes with the most passionate ppl around, and something that allows me to contribute to the creation of the next generation of technology around and have an impact on the people. this is something i really want to do and will enjoy doing. i want to see my physics knowledge applied in various research areas and translated into substance. not only will i be able to contribute, i will be able to work in the field i like and use not only my knowledge but the skills which a formal physics education will equip me with, especially analytical skills, handling of data and logical thinking that will be well needed for research.

i will continue to read abt the pure theoretical part of physics during my free time, and study the math on my own and marvel at how wonderfully it describes the world, with a physics degree (or phd degree when i become a researcher) i will be in a much better position to grasp and understand the complex physical theories and come to new levels of understanding abt this physical universe. so u see it will be a HOBBY that i will pursue (not career).

my physics education will provide me with an ample amount of background knowledge to pursue this hobby to the fullest, and at the same time it allows me to pursue a career i am really passionate in, and i know i will do well. and of cos i do hope that i will be able to fully grasp the theories in future and contribute articles or a paper or two in theoretical physics on my own during my free time, as i have mentioned it wun be a main career. so an intensive and purely theoretical physics career is not for me. i do not need a highly mathematical and 'equation-oriented' career to pursue a hobby in understanding the universe in detail. instead of probing deeper and deeper into the mysteries of the universe and seeking an answer daily, i shall derive joy daily from discovering new possibilities and innovations and improving technologcal capabitilies, while remaining in Physics-related fields of research. =D

ok i guest this post shld be about my experience in NUS, not abt my career and future goals lol. pardon me cos each time i talk abt my goals in life, esp in the physics area i tend to get carried away...well...back to the main topic...

CHATTING WITH AN ATOMIC PHYSICIST

the atomic physicist is the one who gave me and his contact and stuff. he's a foreign talent and he only got a research position in NUS 2 years ago, before that he was at australian national university working as a post doctorate all along and for some reason / and people he came to apply for a postdoc research position in NUS. and switched to mainly teaching cos he really enjoys teaching and he is very satisfied and happy if his words of advice ever changed his students' life in a positive way. he said he would continue his area of research in the near future.

he's very enthusiastic about physics and when i asked him about the career path of a physics major he is entirely optimistic. i asked him about the kinds of research he is working on and also the stuff that he does in NUS. there's a wide variety of research going on at the frontiers of physics, all of which involves very interesting and exciting stuff, it's always gd to look forward to a day in a lab, knowing that u can discover anything anytime, and working on something u like, while at the same time improving ur knowledge and competency.

he told me about the skills that are taught to a physicist (in this case we define physicist to be a physics degree holder), those involve strong analytical skills, logical thinking, working with intensive math and symbols, as well as reasoning and data handling. these are skills which are better taught to a science graduate (esp physics graduate) than in any other form of education, not even in engineering. such skills are essential in life and are almost used in any career and even in any aspect of life.

he even mentioned about a US FINANCIAL firm which will employ ONLY Physics majors. the keyword is 'only', cos the firm recognizes the strong analytical ability of a physicist. also he stressed on the point that a Physics major is able to enter the library, open a book on a subject he likes, and teach himself the subject, any subject. he is able to understand the book and extract its information in a useful way, hence mastering the subject in a short time. he is able to grasp the concepts/ideas/theories with ease. such a book can be on any subject, not even a science one.

to sum up, PHYSICS TEACHES A PERSON TO BE AN INDEPENDENT LEARNER, IN ANYTHING.

the physics degree may not be seen to be 'presitigous', but in terms of skills it teaches u to be sharp and to make logical deductions, a skill that is essential in life. this becomes a valuable asset to succeeding.

we talked abt the physics curriculum as well. it is more or less standard for all unversities to teach the basic foundations in year one and two. eg intro to special relativity, quantum mechanics, thermodynamics, electricty and magnetism, classical mechanics, experimental physics modules. then we specialise in our 3rd and 4th year. have to select 3 modules from abt 15 of them, its a pity we can't learn everything cos i believe theres too much to learn for each of them, its highly specialised. of cos i asked whether we can study additional modules and he replied me with a definite yes, u can take any amount u wan, but chances are the modules may clash such that its best to take only 3 modules, and its possible to squeeze in one or two more.

i believe that students shld not be taking modules to try to fulfil the credit requirements so as to satisfy the criteria of getting a degree, i find that more often than not students are asking,' can this programme be counted into my credits, can my overseas learning trip be counted?' etc. rather i feel that students who are truly passionate abt learning more in the subject they love shld ask whether they can go for additional modules. learn fast and efficiently and the tuition fees will be the same, and u get training and additional knowledge, surely it sounds tempting???

u never get tired of learning anything u are passionate about.

another thing is abt making the choices to choose the modules that u are interested to attend and specialise in. in order to make the best choices, ie choose the modules u are most passionate in and will most definitely enjoy, u need to make informed choices. the professor confirms with me that by the end of the second year, the modules that u have attended are enough for u to know what will be taught in the specialised modules in 3rd and fourth year, furthermore u are given time to think thru ur choices carefully. for eg, nanophysics, quantum optics, photonics, solid state physics sounds very tempting. but i do not know what exactly is being taught in those modules, at least at this level i duno yet. for eg wads the diff between optics and photonics? i rmb my h3 teacher saying that the photonics topic that we learn shld actually be classified under optics. h3 did give me a gd foundation in solid state physics though, it shld be the same as introduction to solid state physics in the university level.

having confirmed with the professor, i know i will be in a safe position to make well informed and wise choices as to which field to specialise in. i believe that its impossible for someone to be sure of the field in which he will eventually work at when he becomes a physicist, at the age of 19...

the atomic physicist also shared with me his journey towards becoming an experimental physicist, and also why he chose that over being a theoretical one. he chatted with his physics professors to decide on his own path. and he also talked about his experience as a PhD student. he shared with me about his first day as a PhD student, when he first entered the lab he was shocked to see a huge variety of machines all over the place. he never thought he would be able to learn how to use each of them and to become familiarize with them. he said its perfectly normal for one to feel that way. its also perfectly ok to start with just one machine, eventually and automatically he became familiar with every single machine and maximising their usage.

he talked about research careers as well. i was curious as to whether we will be able to learn abt everything about the developments in a particular field if we chose to study it. he admitted that as a student he used to wonder that too, but the answer is a definite no. u wun learn abt the development of, say particle physics, in so much detail that u know everything that happens in that field. for eg in 1915 this happened, in 1933 someone wrote a paper on this etc. no, u wun learn all of that. when u become a researcher u nid to work in an area of interest and research on existing papers regarding that area. u can choose to continue a person's work, refer to it or research in a field not worked on by ppl before.

there are many options and a researcher is skilled to do all these analysis. its also perfectly ok for a researcher to enter a lab full of machines and not know how to use most of them. someone will teach the researcher and guide him or her along, and the researcher is given instructions to do this and that and slowly he becomes independent and eventually if he is good enough he can come up with his own research, lead a research team and even form his own research team and guied everyone along and point a research direction for everyone to follow. such would be my aim i guess, to be able to research in a field i like and come up with my own research topic and questions and provide the necessary procedure for research or to utilize labs in a way i like or to implement my own stuff.

physics opens up a wide variety of research opportunities, even in research institutes that work on biotechnology, cos of the imaging equipment etc that requires a lot of physics knowledge, and once u are a researcher u can be one in many areas, not stuck to one area. u dun have to specialise highly in one. its super exciting u see.

i asked him how to prepare for my physics course as well, while serving my ns and surprisingly wad he says is ample preparation is lesser than wad i do LOL.

CHATTING WITH PHYSICS MAJORS

i went to take a look at the CCA booths in the sports hall and i found a science club booth. i said i was interested in physics and two people there were quite happy to here that. they are physics majors in their second year.

i asked them about what they intend to pursue as a career. one of them is going to take up a PhD and to apply for a research position in NUS while the other wants to do a Masters Degree in actuarial science. the latter guy looks like someone from the arts sch or some music sch. his hair is very long and he looks fashionable but when he talks about physics u can tell he's a physics major...

he gave me a few physics jokes and told me abt the usefulness of the physics degree. of cos its the analytical skills once again. and also another thing is that a Physicist is able to interpret charts, graphs and diagrams and other forms of information and make logical deductions and accurate predictions. for eg by looking at a graph of the value of a stock he is able to make predictions abt the stock in future, its very useful. also, he told me abt blackbody radiation. there's one formula, which i also learnt in h3, that shows that the radiation intensity of a blackbody is directly proportional to the temperature of the blackbody to the power of 4. it is somewhat similar to a trend in the stock market, he told me. i forgot the exact relationship of the stock thing but this means that the mathematics used to study and model the blackbody radiation can be used on the stocks!

another example i know of is brownian motion, the mathematics used to model this random motion can be used to model the random roughess of surfaces of mountains and stuff, i wun go into detail.

in Physics u learn to apply mathematical models to physical theories, the more complex they are, the greater the satisfaction and joy u gain from grasping the theories fully, and the greater the excitement u derive in the process of studying them.

by learning to understanding how to physically model something or to use mathematical models to solve problems and stuff, u are acquiring a skill. the mathematics which u learn can be easily applied to something else, u know u can easily apply it to another thing bcos u've already acquired the skill and gain a full understanding of the mathematics. furthermore, even if u're unsure of applying it in other areas, u can easily learn on ur own, remember physics teaches a person to be independent learners. thus in future, shld i decide to invest and to manage my finances, the skills that i've acquired in my physics education is useful enough for me to make wise choices. i can even pick from a variety of mathematical models to analyse something that i want to invest in, and also read up and learn a bit on my own. in learning physics, i automatically obtain the skills to do all that.

the skills acquired also allow u to make wise decisions from logical deductions and solve problems in life. u learn to break problems up and tackle and analyse them one by one. u learn to get to the root of a problem. hence physics majors who find themselves to be police or detectives in future say that their skills acquired during the university days are constantly in use.

k back to the chatting with these physics people. they talked abt physics in university being very different from physics in jc (this one i definitely know), u learn to question and also become inquisitive. we are truly interested in the derivation and proofs of the formulas we learn, how they are discovered etc. its a true joy learning the subject for all of us with the passion.

i'm really happy to chat with so many people who are passionate in physics all at once. we can really understand what each other is talking about. and of course when we talk about physics as in the subject itself we can understand the terms etc. i can mention abt roger penrose and michio kaku and he has a story to tell. this is unlike the usual response i get asking who the hell is penrose lol. i discuss with people in forums and in facebook, but i never once found so many people to talk to in person. it was a most enriching experience at the NUS open house.

i am very much an independent learner. i collect textbooks (not just Physics) (most people can't understand that at all) and make frequent visits to the library. the obsession with learning (esp from books) came a couple of years ago and the amazing library at HCI contributed much to it. its a pity i dun make it in time for the NUS science library tour. its one of the best academic library in South East Asia...imagine stepping inside and going to the Physics section...wooowww. almost everytime when i book out of camp i will put aside some time to visit the library. and i travelled to three different library just to grab 3 books that i wanted so much to read. (national, yishun and sembawang library) i'm happy that the process of learning physics will give me the skills of becoming a strong independent learner. in fact i believe that most physics majors are passionate learners due to their curiosity towards the workings of nature in its most fundamental level and also their attitude towards finding things out. (eg not satisfied with just a formula without its derivation and proof etc)

the trip to NUS opens my mind up to broader perspectives on the subject and getting a degree in this area, as well as confirmed my own thoughts and opinions on the matter.

hence i have my career goals sorted out, and i know the kind of pursuits in life that i wan, hobbies etc...

the passion in Physics is a strong enough reason for me to pursuit a degree in it, always ALWAYS go for passion... apart from that, the pursuit of such a degree gives me skills that will be essential in all aspects of my life.

having said all these, there isn't a slightest need to hesitate in taking up a Physics degree, this is a perfect degree for me.

Outing with Bunkmates =)

2009-03-13T09:53:00.007+08:00

met with my bunkmates at city hall yesterday, shall upload grp pics first

eating at ministry of food, some jap restaurant

in front of fountain of wealth...

at suntec city, just below the IT show area

BOWLING

first up was bowling at marina square.it was super ex! 4 dollars per game cos we are no longer student, damn, should have just given our student pass instead of the 11b (SAF IC).

MANDARIN HOTEL

after that everyone went to arcade, as i do not play any games, i went to do some exploring with xan and we came to mandarin hotel. obviously we need a card key to have access to the lift and we didnt have one, so we just waited for some foreigner to go up and we followed. hehe. but it was impressive, the place was lovely and right at the lift there's a lady dressed fully in red pressing the lifts for us!

when we went there she was asking, 'up or down?' then i got stunned and said, 'err...up.' the hotel is 21 storey high and we were lucky that the foreigner stays at 20th storey. even at 20th storey we could here music playing, the whole hotel was basically filled with music. below is a pic of the view of the 4th level of the hotel right from 20th storey.

view from 20th level when u look directly below.

when u look across the 20th level, this is the view, nice design.

another view below, this time we were standing opposite to the lifts, look carefully and u can see the lifts on their way up or down.

esplanade below haha, but the view is very narrow cos we are not in a hotel room.

this is a view from inside the hotel room, very nice. we were lucky 2 rooms were under renovation and thus the doors were not locked, and all the renovators were in one room so we went into the other.

me

xan

after that we (with the rest of the ppl) went to IT show and we didnt really buy anything but had a lot of fun haha. it was too crowded.

dinner was at another ex jap restaurant...

eric

janson and me

xan, chris and caven

kumar and eric

chris and caven

FOUNTAIN OF WEALTH

we went to this fountain of wealth place and below is a picture of the water sparying with the light shining on it, the light changes colour every now and then and the view from above is fantastic.

they allowed people to go in the fountain (when the water stops splashing) to 'get some luck'. the instructions were something like to walk around the fountain 3 times and touch the water etc.

caven and me at the fountain.

xan and kumar

close up shot of fountain of wealth!

caven and me walking back, last to leave the fountain haha.

i shall end this post abruptly, got tons of stuff to settle. will leave my feelings and thoughts aside for now.

NS Song

2009-03-12T12:38:00.002+08:00

On the first day of NS my seargent gave to me, a brand new FAD.

On the second day of NS my seargent gave to me, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the third day of NS my seargent gave to me, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the fourth day of NS my seargent gave to me, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the fifth day of NS my seargent gave to me, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the sixth day of NS my seargent gave to me, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the seventh day of NS my seargent gave to me, seven core values, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the eigth day of NS my seargent gave to me, eight click route march, seven core values, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the ninth day of NS my seargent gave to me, nine push ups, eight click route march, seven core values, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the tenth day of NS my seargent gave to me, ten lights out, nine push ups, eight click route march, seven core values, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the eleventh day of NS my seargent gave to me, eleven-B, ten lights out, nine push ups, eight click route march, seven core values, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

On the twelth day of NS my seargent gave to me, twelve bunkmates, eleven-B, ten lights out, nine push ups, eight click route march, seven core values, six candles, 5BX, four number four, three PT Kits, two gutters, and a brand new FAD.

Zhong Yin Sheng - CO Instrument

2009-02-28T17:40:00.001+08:00

last weekend i borrowed the co instrument which i play from catholic high to play in some audition. and i took a video of it and gave a short intro on youtube since no one has ever posted a video on that instrument before. (im probably one of the few people who can play that instrument AND know how to use youtube at the same time haha) so i shall make a quick post (copied and paste from youtube) on this video.

description on youtube:

me playing a part of my favourite chinese orchestra melody on the zhong yin sheng (medium tuned sheng). some of the notes are very low and i need some polishing on my vibrato skills. =) uploaded this video just to share with everyone the unique tune of the sheng, its a chinese mouth organ and when its sound is recorded and played it sounds a bit like the organ itself.

there are buttons in front of the instrument which and my fingers are pressing on them, i couldnt get the camera to film my fingers pressing them. when a button is pressed, it opens a hole through which i can blow and the air will pass through a particular tube (among the golden tubes of the instrument), as such, chords can be played when i press many buttons at once. as you might have guessed, the shorter the tube the higher the pitch and yea there are stationary sound waves in the tubes. and u can produce the same note both by blowing and breathing in.

for the first part of the melody i am playing chords of three notes at a time and it sounds nice together, then i played the same thing but increased the octave and for the second part its one note at a time. for the last part its a repeat of the first part of the melody but this time i played chords of two notes at a time.

i realize that there are not many videos that show the zhong yin sheng on youtube, only those which show the gao yin sheng (higher tune sheng), so i hope that people will get to know more about this instrument through this video. enjoy the video! =)

BMTC

2009-02-15T14:32:00.004+08:00

one bad memory i forgot to include in the last post was about my grandma's death, not very relevant to BMT though. heard about the news at night when i called home. 3rd day i think, and i couldnt sleep well, cos she was in indonesia i dun think a few days bookout is enough for me. so i tried to get over it and eventually i did. after all shes almost 90 years old already.

everyday is a better day in Tekong, at least for the first week, as u get to meet more and more people and become more and more of a lao jiao. but when theres free time, u may get bored in the bunk, cos theres no such thing as taking a walk downstairs. yes the beaches are nice and theres one whole stretch just a block away. but we're not allowed to go there and sit down and enjoy the scenery, i mean its understood lol. so i kinda regret not being a book in at times. but then again, if i brought a book in i may just hide in one corner in the bunk to read instead of interacting. one of the most interesting experiences is meeting different people as i had said earlier. marching and all that wasnt very interesting i must say, though it keeps things neat and orderly.

one of the first few things you shld do after booking out is to meet friends of course, then get a really really warm and long shower and stuff. some may rush to KFC etc. and anyway thanks Desmond for treating me to Swensens at white sands right after my book out. for me, another place i must visit is the LIBRARY!!! so i went yishun library yesterday but the book i wanted to borrow before my bmt (but didnt have the chance to) was already on loan. i would have guessed that...remember the Roger Penrose's book i blogged about a few posts back?

TWO BOOKS TO ACCOMPANY ME

but nevertheless i borrowed two other books to accompany me during my BMT (hope i have the free time to read). one thing i like abt yishun library is that the books are very new. those very new books (eg physics of the impossible by Michio Kaku, see pic below) were only released last year and i read about this book lauching last year on the physics websites. cos yishun library just moved to a new place beside norhpoint so i got to borrow such books that just appeared even in places like kinokunniya.

these books' due date is on 7th or march and my POP graduation from bmtc is on 10th of march so they shld be accompanying me for quite a long time in tekong.

my fren said that my brain has degenerated after going to BMT. to some extent yes. u no longer do math or stuff in bmt. u are programmed to follow instructions and schedules carefully, there's no room for creativity. everyone does it the same way, and arranges stuff in the cupboard the same way, everything is standardized, including the way u hold ur rifle when u sit or stand, or the place u put ur helmet when u take it off. u march neatly everywhere, the army songs and left, left, left right left rings in ur head always. u follow the tempo etc. u dun talk about sch or academic stuff in general, so ur brain may turn rusty. or to phrase it in a more ugly way, ur mind becomes a robotic mind ready to be programmed.

TIPS

so it seems very unenjoyable eh? all these routine and monotonous lifestyle i mean. the trick is that u must ask urself why u are doing all these, why u are being 'programmed' etc...find a logical reason for everything, then u wun find it meaningless to do such things. its for ur own good. if u do it for the sake of doing then life in BMTC will be kinda sad.

ask urself why u are repeating and repeating songs. one thing i am certain of is when such army songs are sang during running they distract u from ur fatigue and u can push urself further. it works i guarantee u. we are told to clap and sing when we are tired, then we can run together. another thing is it builds the spirit, as well as it ensures that we march in steps during marching

marching is for neatness and orderly, imagine the sergeant dismiss u for lunch right at ur bunk and tell u when to come back. everyone will just run towards the cookhouse and there will be chaos, how will they be able to account for ur presence then? of cuz i would love to walk to the cookhouse by the shortest route and at my own pace, but if everyone does the same thing it would be rather chaotic...

instilling discipline and training us to follow instructions is the most basic and important thing. they start by making sure we follow simple instructions like falling in on time. true, i dun like the fact that we may be punished when we are one minute late etc. at the first look it seems meaningless and unneccessary, but think about it, in times of war, if we dun follow our commanders, what will happen? if they tell u not to fire and u fire freely u may get everyone in trouble as the enemy would have identified where u guys are. and every second is important, not to mention minutes. so as much as i hate the rigid discipline and the routine lifestyle, i am willing to follow the instructions because there is a logical reason for doing so...

so before u can conclude that u are doing something for the sake of doing it, try to come up with a gd reason for doing it.

finally, in order to prevent my brain from turning really rusty, i have decided to bring those two books in cos they require some deep thinking from the reader. this will ensure that i exercise my brain in tekong as well.

i shall enjoy my last few hours in mainland. when u're in mainland after booking out, u really learn to treasure ur time here. cos its no longer like the holidays u can afford to take the nap and wake up to see ur home and neighbourhood and meet frens everyday. u noe that every hour of ur nap now means one less hour of being conscious on mainland!!! so u tend to sleep less andreally really treasure ur time awake here. u remember that back in tekong the most u could do is to stare at this big island from tekong, and to recognize the changi airport from there. well. tonight i'll be sleeping at the bunk again. two endurance training in one day - tomorrow. haha gd luck to myself. =) i dun feel depressed or wad about going back there, now that i've made friends and i can safely say i've adapted to life in tekong already, apart from the occasional missing and dreaming about being back in mainland. =p

First Book Out from Tekong

2009-02-14T23:55:00.004+08:00

firstly, this is how i look now.

i noe i look damn tired, took the pic yesterday night after booking out and meeting desmond and kenneth, the two ppl who stay in pasir ris, and yes i noticed that i look very black. notice the v shape black-pale boundary at the collar...

well, its my first book out after two weeks of confinement/adjustment period in BMTC (Pulau Tekong)...two weeks of stuff to blog about. thank goodness im not allowed to talk abt military stuff and training due to security reasons, else i can talk abt it for 3 days without stopping. stories and experiences just keep on accumulating.

i shall talk more abt the feelings in general then...i am surprised i can still type....nvm...

DAY 1 - ENLISTING

k the most miserable and nervous moment was when u were eating lunch with ur parents (who came to send u off) in tekong and then the announcer spoke, parents prepare to say farewell to ur sons, enlistees may now fall in at the parade square. i felt lost...how can i just leave my parents and step onto the parade square all on my own with a whole bunch of strangers?

eh no thats not the worst part, the worst part was when they waved goodbye to me while i fall in at the parade square and was taken awy by the sergeants. from then on, freedom would be restricted, where would i be led to by the sergeants? i had no idea. and i knew that night i would be sleeping with my bunkmates, not at home. my parents had left...i was really all alone. gd thing was, everyone was feeling the same way i suppose. i mean u can imagine, a day ago u were back at home, two days ago u were celebrating CNY with all ur relatives and playing cards etc...

i was lost, lonely, nervous, depressed, uncertain...everywhere seemed like the same (well the buildings were TOO similar u can easily mistake another company's buiding for urs if not for the label...) felt really really bad...

well, that was the first moment of enlisting, the feeling didnt last too long. next we were split into our platoons. got our army stuff, u noe uniform etc. glad my bed buddy (the guy who sleeps on a bed beside urs) left me with a great impression by helping me to carry my stuff).

SHAVING hair wasn't too bad. since im used to the half bald hairstyle. the hair will grow back anyway and my head is quite suitable for that kind of hairstyle, not to mention that its cooling. so its totally ok for me. some people were rather sad about it. seriously, i dun care how much hair i have...

FIRST FEW DAYS

first few days was nothing much, everyone was adapting etc. it is VERY easy to make frens esp with bunkmates cos u do everything together! eat, sleep, bathe, march, wadeva, everything, anything!!! as an extreme introvert, i usually only start to make friends with classmates only after a month, or worse still at times a few months. u noe me. but in army it was accelerated to a MERE 4 DAYS!!! within 4 days i was shouting in the bunk already. u can imagine!!! yea so dun worry about being lonely. u will make new friends in no time.

right now im chatting with 2 bunkmates online...lol...
so within a few days u become lao jiao already LOL!

my buddy is 22 years old this year, so quite mature and very independent already i would say, thank goodness. u can tell who are the independent ones who can easily take care of themselves and who are the blur and helpless ones. those older ones happen to be more mature, not surprisingly though.

imagine, i learnt so much from sec 4 till now, 2 years of jc taught me alot alot and i know i learnt, i know my way of viewing life is different, more matured, more lifeskills, social skills, everything, two years is really alot. imagine i am given 3 more years to learn, in a tertiary institution like poly...i will turn into a really really mature adult i guess.

THE PEOPLE

in NS, u meet a lot of people from all walks of life. u understand their own unique perspective to life in general. u are no longer surrounding by people who study the same subjects as u or those who are aiming for same paper qualifications as u. u see people who may have started working, have earned their diploma, or who may think that jc is a freaking waste of time. u listen to their views etc. its a time when u really get to know more about singaporeans and realize that the people u get to know in the past 18 years of ur life are such a limited bunch...

the 2 weeks confinement period did help a lot for u to adapt to bmt life. for me i had a lot of interaction time during weekends and we get used to everything there, though i dun really like the lack of freedom. but staying in bunk with ur bunkmates is a gd thing too i guess.

if we were to book out and in every week we might never have adapted that quickly. right now i noe when i go back in Tekong i will miss mainland again. i almost forgotten about mainland already then now suddenly book out.

its like breaking up with a partner, u start to adapt and do without the partner, all of a sudden u meet him/her again and is forced to leave her again. well u get the analogy...haha...

BOOKING OUT

booking out was, obviously, a great experience for everyone. i booked out at 4pm yesterday, whole company. we were like shouting on the bus back in mainland. when we were on the ferry we finally see the BMTC moving away from us. when we were in mainland, on bus from SAF Ferry Terminal to Pasir Ris, we were like shouting WOAH HDB Flats and YES we go really WOOOOWWWW, then we shouted woah SBS Bus, WOAH GOT TRAFFIC LIGHT!!! this probably illustrates how 'deprived' we are back in there. and many people went to grab macdonalds when we alighted the bus. seeing hdb flat felt gd.

and yesterday i cant get used to the fact that im in white sands shopping centre moving freely, going everywhere i wanna go without asking for permission. is that true? where are the commanders and commands? why am i not marching from place to place...? i guess its more of the freedom that i long for, more than mainland lol. seriously... even till now, i cant believe im typing on a com!!! i shld be fast asleep on my bunk bed now!!!

gosh now i cant adapt to mainland...lol. when i look out of my window its hdb flats, not company buildings!!!

and talking about food, BMTC food is GOOD!!! at times got soup, still give green bean soup, and still have fruit or dessert and drink altogether, not to mention the rice and chicken and all that. and at times fried chicken, hams, eggs etc. i wonder why people will hate the food there and long to eat outside food...

kk anyway i gtg sleep already. its too late. 1.20am now!!! yesterday i was so tired yet i slept at 2am cos must treasure awake time in mainland. suppose to lights out at 10pm haha!

Screwed Feelings...

2009-01-27T20:12:00.005+08:00

i can't believe i actually made it in time to blog for yet another time before enlisting. im feeling very screwed now as i had already guessed...

CHINESE NEW YEAR

first thing which contributes to my screwed feelings is the celebration in JB, meeting relatives and all that. really treasure my time with them and i really have a lot of fun with these people each time during CNY.

me with a few of my cousins...

every year, i will feel quite sad after CNY, sian and lonely kind of feeling. cos its like its all over and my cousins are again now with me etc. so even if the holidays continue i will still feel screwed.

and the worst part is im enlisting tomorrow. Tomorrow!!!!!!
haiz...i will miss home miss relatives miss frens etc, though i know i got to adapt. its like a double nightmare. i'm sad enough not to be with my relatives, not to mention i wun be at home soon, you get the point.

its really a bad bad time to be enlisted, theres no way i can make up for my lost sleep yesterday. of cuz i wun be able to sleep yesterday with all my cousins around. i dunno how i'm going to make it tomorrow. and by this time tomorrow i will probably be sleeping with 12 strangers in the same bunk. i can't imagine that seriously. its marks the end of this festive season as long as the holidays, and also the beginning of.....(depends on how u look at it)

LAST MINUTE STUFF

i had to go back on MY OWN today because of so many last minute stuff i've left till now. so many things to settle!!! i had to leave early from JB without my family members. and i still havent finished settling everything. super busy rushing around the house like mad. and i dun really wanna leave anything unsettled and that includes borrowed library books! OMG!

and i've fallen sick! right now im supposed to be chatting with frens and relaxing, definitely i cant stay so busy then suddenly switch to sleeping mood...and im not wasting time to blog now. i got to emo here and at least vent out some of my feelings before i can sleep more peacefully later!

anyway thanks for all those who wished me luck. really appreciated that. and that includes the juniors..really really would have felt much worse without all ur encouragement. haiz. and i've fallen sick. sore throat, cough, runny nose, my nose is really filled with liquid now...damn. kk gtg see ya guys!!! hope i can feel better man...

i'm damn depressed now!!! and i shldnt even have laughed at ivan's emo tone...

Relativity Essay

2009-01-26T10:30:00.003+08:00

k one last post before enlisting. please start reading from the third most recent post as i talk about my feelings for today. take your time to slowly read through my posts as i WON'T be blogging for a long long time, till my first book out from NS i dunno when.

anyway since im not going to blog for so long, i'm going to share an essay that i've written on Relativity. it is for my interest's sake and i since i have read many books on the topic especially during this holiday i thought it would be good to write a comprehensive essay to consolidate my knowledge on that topic. and to explain to others what this topic is all about.

it is incomplete and i haven't reached the main point in the essay yet so please take note! haiz i have so many incomplete things that i have to leave aside due to NS. happy reading!!! and also do note that i will explain every single simple terms in detail.

RELATIVITY ESSAY

For the past few days (or weeks) I've been continuously reading Einstein's Biography and the book "Relativity" that was written by him (wanted to read it before prelims but didn't have the time). And I must say my understanding of Relativity (the Special Theory in particular) has indeed deepened. By reading different books on the same thing, especially when they describe a same theory or a law, we are exposed to various interpretations of it. Thus from the different approaches to understanding Special Relativity, as well as the different ways of modeling/describing/'visualizing', I was inspired to write about the Special Theory of Relativity in my very own words and from my own understanding and way of 'visualizing' it, while occasionally referring to the views of others. The reason why I included the inverted commas for 'visualizing' in the previous sentence is due to the fact that we cannot really visualize time, which Relativity deals very much with. There's no right or wrong interpretation for it (I believe), and I truly enjoyed the different approaches (both mathematically and linguistically) I've encountered throughout these years, by scientists from different backgrounds, be it String Theorists, Astronomers, Mathematicians or Einstein himself. Once again a warning I must give to readers is that while this discussion of space-time can be very engaging to some, others may find it mentally taxing or even boring.

Firstly, I shall give an explanation of how the special theory came about. In the 19th century, a serious conflict between the principle of relativity in Classical (Newtonian) Mechanics (aka Galilean Relativity) and Electrodynamics exists. Classical Mechanics refers to the laws of motion etc, and Electrodynamics refers to the theory of electromagnetism including the law of the propagation of light (an electromagnetic wave).

Before we are ready to understand the conflict, I must first explain the principle of relativity, and also the theorem of the addition of velocities in classical mechanics in detail. The principle of relativity before Einstein's theory came about suggests that the laws of Physics are the same in all inertial (I will explain later what this means) frames of reference. Frames of reference in this case refer to the systems of coordinates within which we measure a position (using the x, y and z spatial coordinates to describe it) of an event and also the time (using the time t coordinate) at which it occurs. The frame of reference of a person or a body is considered to be at rest with respect to them. For example, a person standing on the ground and a person in a train moving with a constant velocity (with respect to the ground) are in different frames of reference, with the latter moving at the same velocity of the train with respect to the ground and the former at rest with respect to the ground (hence these two frames move with respect to each other). Instead of using the phrase 'in the frame of reference with respect to someone', I may refer to it with the simpler term 'from someone's viewpoint'. Consider the following example, a person in a moving train drops an apple, from the person's viewpoint (ie, in the frame of reference of the person in the train), the apple travels in a straight line downwards and hits the ground. However, from the viewpoint of a person standing on the ground, the apple travels with a parabolic motion and hits the ground.

According to the principle of relativity, both are equally right in their description of the motion of the apple and that the laws of mechanics governing the subsequent motion of the apple after dropping it are the same for both of them. For example each person concludes that Newton's Law of Gravitation holds in his observation; the apple falls with an acceleration of g in both cases due to the gravitational force acting on it. Also, each concludes that Newton's First Law holds, for example, in the absence of a net external force acting on the apple in the horizontal direction, the apple either continues in its state of rest (in the horizontal direction, as seen by the person in the train that the apple does not have horizontal velocity), or its state of uniform motion in a straight line (as seen by the person on the ground as the apple was always travelling with a velocity which is equal to the velocity of the train in the horizontal direction before and after it is dropped). Hence all the laws of mechanics hold in the different reference frames. (Everything is still fine for now, before the laws of electrodynamics come into the picture.)

The above principle holds only in all inertial frames of reference, the definition of such a frame is a frame in which Newton's First Law is valid, meaning that in the absence of any net external force acting on an object, the object continues in its state of rest or uniform motion in a straight line. An object in this frame does not move about suddenly 'on its own' or stop abruptly if it is already moving. Hence, we are in an inertial frame of reference if we move with a constant velocity in space beyond the influence of any gravitational field (eg Newton's First Law holds for an object 'floating' beside us if we release it in this frame). An example of a non-inertial frame will be that of person in a rotating merry go round. Consider an isolated star in the sky beyond the influence of any force, in the point of view of the person in the merry go round, the star seems to be moving round and round in the sky from his viewpoint, hence he concludes that the star is undergoing an acceleration (centripetal) despite the fact that there is no net external force acting on it. Clearly, Newton's First Law does not hold in this frame. In Classical Mechanics, the laws of mechanics do not hold in non-inertial frames. In fact non-inertial frames are not dealt with even in the Special Theory of Relativity and only included in the General Theory.

Before moving on to the theorem of addition of velocities in classical mechanics, we shall consider the following case. A person initially standing at a fixed position in a train (moving at a velocity of u1 with respect to the ground) starts to walk towards the front of the train (in the exact direction at which the train is moving) with a velocity of u2 relative to the train. The question I would like to raise is: with what velocity v does the man advance relative to the ground during the process? If the person were to stand still for a second in the train, we know that, clearly, the person would have advanced through a distance of u1 relative to the ground. As a consequence of his walking, however, he traverses an additional distance u2 relative to the train, and hence also relative to the ground (or at least this seems to be the case in classical mechanics), in a second. Hence we conclude that he covers a total distance u1 + u2 relative to the ground as he moves in the train in one second and his velocity with respect to the ground is v = u1 + u2. The approach to determining the person’s velocity in the simple example above expresses the theorem of the addition of velocities employed in classical mechanics.

Every Physics student in school learns that light always travels in straight lines in a vacuum at a velocity of c = 3.0 x 108 m/s. This is known as the Law of Propagation of Light (law of constancy of the velocity of light). In fact, we know that all electromagnetic waves propagate in vacuum with this speed, regardless of their frequency. This constant speed of light emerges naturally from Maxwell’s Equations (which form the basis for the theory of classical electromagnetism). We shall see that this law is in direct conflict with the principle of relativity in classical mechanics.

to be continued...

The Road to Reality : A Complete Guide to the Laws of the Universe

2009-01-26T10:04:00.005+08:00

k one more post before enlisting.

first of all there's gonna be a solar eclipse at 4.30pm today!!! make sure u noe where the sun is!

http://wildshores.blogspot.com/2009/01/solar-eclipse-today.html

anyway, i stumbled across this book "The Road to Reality : A Complete Guide to the Laws of the Universe" yesterday and can't help feeling that the author's name is very familiar. its by roger penrose and i realized i encountered his name in my Time Barrier book. he's knighted for his services to science, hence 'Sir Roger Penrose' and is one of the greatest living scientists around, together with Edward Witten, Stephen Hawking etc.

this book is the perfect book, it gives a thorough treatment to things like relativity and quantum mechanics and also modern developements and unifying theories proposed and how they provide a basis for a unifying theory. it does not just describe it with words but gives a very detailed mathematical treatment, mathematics that physicists use in their DAILY work!!!

u might wonder how are we gonna understand the math, well, this book consists of about 300 pages just for equipping you with the proper math tools, and it even describes how the tools were formed and makes use of wonderful diagrams to present everything clearly. hence everything, from calculus to geometry to complex number and complex number integration, hypercomplex numbers, geometry of logarithms etc etc etc. its really wonderful, its everything i need to know about modern physics and its developments, and it describes the use of tools of physics as well, for eg 4 dimensional geometry for spacetime etc. really good.

i need to finish the university physics textbook BEFORE going on to this book. this guy here writes about theoretical physics concenrning the deepest mysteries of the universe plus equations and u definitely can't expect it to be year 1 or year 2 uni physics level. and im not going to ignore the equations mentioned in the book. i've heard of all the math tools involved in physics and have sort of make a compilation but i dunno how im going to find all the different books that will teach us those tools, plus all the modern theories, how am i gonna find all the notes etc? u may well need like 20 books for all this information and so here there's this brilliant guy who made a compilation of everything. all in one!!! =)

and it is said that if Einstein and Newton were around this book would definitely be one of the books on their shelves. he spent 8 YEARS on this book!!!

below is an editorial review of this book.

Roger Penrose has worked in many areas of mathematical physics and cosmology, but is perhaps most famous for his collaboration with Stephen Hawking. Together, they proved that, in the mathematical model of general relativity, our universe was originally contained within a sphere of zero radius. That is, all space and matter was contained within a point called a singularity. They also proved that space, time and matter had a beginning in what is called the big bang.

Penrose holds the most respected chair in mathematics at Oxford, just as Hawking holds the most respected chair at Cambridge. Stephen Hawking's A Brief History of Time and The Universe in a Nutshell introduced mathematical physics without using equations, and kept things simple. If you want equations, and more depth, then The Road to Reality by Roger Penrose is a must buy.

Mathematics

This book provides the mathematical background needed for understanding physical theories through the same equations that theoretical physicists use in their everyday work. The aim is to convey a detailed overall understanding - a feeling for the deep beauty and philosophical connotations of the subject, as well as of its intricate logical interconnections.

It's a challenging read, but there is enough descriptive material to carry the less mathematically inclined reader through, as well as some 450-500, mostly hand-drawn, figures. The book provides a feeling for all the key issues and deep current controversies, and counters the common complaint that the details of cutting-edge science are fundamentally inaccessible.

The topics covered include: the roles of different kinds of numbers and geometry in physics; the ideas - and magic - of calculus; notions of infinity; the physics and mathematics of relativity theory; the foundations and controversies of quantum mechanics; the standard model of particle physics; cosmology; the big bang; black holes; the profound challenge of the second law of thermodynamics; string and M theory; loop quantum gravity; twistors; fashions in science; and new directions.

now that i've found out the perfect book that im lacking. i just got to buy it and master it. its such an exciting moment and to think im enlisting soon...haiz.

Chinese New Year

2009-01-26T08:20:00.002+08:00

first of all i would like to wish everyone a very Happy Lunar New Year!
well, soon i'll be going off to JB and i can only come back late at night tomorrow. and im enlisting the following day (wednesday), so sad la. definitely will not have enough rest haha. i mean i definitely wun sleep tonight, i dun get to visit cousins often yea...so it will be enjoying for now, food, firecrackers etc. then suddenly enlist! arghhh...

so this may well be the last post before i enlist. i remember ivan's last post before enlisting sounds like he's going off for good. while everyone is doing spring cleaning and excited about the new year, im packing my bag and worrying about my enlistment and to be honest im really dreading the day of enlistment. i've some bad recounts of people who have been there and i dun feel very excited about it.

its not a gd day for enlistment man, i just got myself a physics textbook and furthermore realized that someone has compiled everything i need to know, including the math required in understanding them, in one single book and that book is in yishun library. i wanted to grab the book and bring it to tekong but i was too late the library had closed when i went there yesterday. sighzzz i will definitely miss the mainland when im inside there, life's gonna be very different and i got to admit that the holidays are ending soon. really hope someone close to me will be in my section.

i will make full use of NS life to learn whatever there is to learn, but worst come to worst, i might just treat NS as a mere distraction and return home everyday to study my Physics and Math (after BMT of course). its not my nature to not do my best for something, but i can't change the fact that im not combat fit because of an arm injury. furthermore the math involved with certain topics in Physics is horrifying. if i dun start now i may not be able to catch up in future and this explains why i've been so busy for the past few days. im definitely going to give my brain as much training as im gonna receive for my physical body during NS. my PE teacher once said, 'use it or lose it.' he was referring to our muscles, but the same applies to your brain, so if im going to study an academic subject in university i can't afford to enter the course with a blur mind.

as i think about enlistment, many questions are ringing through my mind. will my bunk mates be nice people? can i take the training? will i be homesick? will i miss my friends? and i realize the best way is to dump this questions aside.

well goodbye for at least two weeks. i may get depressed in camp and send emo smses to close friends. =(

=)

2009-01-22T23:25:00.003+08:00

its been quite long since i've blogged, hehe, cos i've been kinda busy these days, not with working or job, but with books!

firstly, i've finally gotten a uni physics text for 20 DOLLARS!!! YAY!!! remember the Physics for Scientists and Engineers WITH MODERN PHYSICS that i've talked about in one of my posts last year? the book is extremely tempting and i've been trying to hunt it down online. and all of a sudden while simply browsing thru some books i found this!!!

its 7th edition!!! the most recent edition book that i've ever touched before (as well as the one i blogged about) is the 6th edition, and this edition is soooo new that even most popular bookstores as well as kinokuniya doesnt sell it!!! when i saw the 20 dollars thing i was wondering if this book was a 5th edition, when i went that website the book was just put up for sale a few hours ago, i just go in one hour later prob the book not on the front webpage already.

so i checked the edition and to my surprise it was 7th edition, this is simply great! in kinokunniya the SAME book and some more 6th edition (hardcover though) costs 127 DOLLARS!!! that time i went with desmond he saw it! and this book i bought only have a little bit of highlighted words, very little, no scribblings nothing! really really great.

seriously i can only dream of owning such a new book in the past. 6th edition costs a bomb already and this 7th edition book is not even available in HC library till very very very late last year when im about to graduate...i was trying all methods to get one for a cheap price and i failed, so even flipping thru (and reading) the 6th edition in hci library excites me. now as im typing, the 7th edition is right in front of me, lying safely on my table. and its even a newer edition that the 8 6th edition books that ive so passionately flipped through over the past year. xD =) xD

the thickness is shown above, this is enough to last me till my ns is over...remember its not the full thickness, we're viewing slightly from above and theres parallax error...

and the pic above shows the pages of the book. u can tell its condition is not bad and without any scribblings. anyway this page is on the derivation of the equation e=mc2 through some integration to find work done and an object's kinetic energy.

a week ago, after much begging online, i got the same book for free. but as u can see (below) its the SECOND edition...i was quite satisfied with this and i tot i would spend the next one year at least studying this book. its extremely outdated bcos the book was published in 1986 and there are a lot of changes made.

and notice theres no 'with modern physics' for this book and we know that modern physics is the MOST exciting part of physics today.

throughout 22 years the book progressed from 2nd edition to 7th edition, on average is about 4-5 years 'per new edition' of book. and this book i just got for 20 bucks was published in 2008!!! all the latest meaning the guy who sold me (some NTU mechanical and aerospace engineering guy) must've just gotten it for like half the year before his physics module ended or found the book irrelevant to some parts of his course. and this 7th edition will stay as the newest edition for at least another 3 years, with all the latest developments in it...now i can learn everything happily while safely knowing that everything i learn is correct and experimentally confirmed as of now. =)

when we met at the mrt station i realise he's like 22 or 23 years old and i was wearing my cat high PE shirt (which i normally wear at home) haha! he was quite shocked to see me as buyer and he tot that i was taking uni this year haha. i guess not many people read (and collect) textbooks as hobby.

heres 4 books i borrowed from the library recently, with some planning. the top right hand corner shows the einstein biography book which i planned to read first to discover and rediscover about einstein's whole life and his theories, then i will read the relativity (top left hand corner) in which he himself writes about the special and general theory of relativity to give the masses 'an exact insight' to them. hence when i reading the book i will understand when einstein is writing the book and what he is experiencing during the period of his life. he added in a last appendix 3 years before he died btw...to address the problems concerning space and time from is views.

next i will read about time travelling (bottom left) and how scientists have explored it and tried to break the barrier of time. i believe we are on the verge of really breaking it since time is no longer of an independent existence that flows forward on its own no matter what we do. the last book is the most chim one (dun think i can complete b4 NS), its called theories of everything - the quest for ultimate explanation it contains a bit of philosophy as well. but of cuz unifying theories like string theories are described, and the various constants we learn in physics are explained, and also mathematics as a tool. the definition of mathematics as a language of science is also explained, it addresses many things and i cant wait to read it. seriously wished for the millionth time that i dun have to go NS and can continue reading and reading.

u probably think ive made a big fuss over buying a 7th edition book but u dunno how looooong ive been eyeing even the 6th edition one, since the day i touched that book in HC's library. and i love love love books and believe the money u use to buy them is always worth it. cos books (textbooks in particular) consists of so much information that the greatest human minds have seeked to find and u just go to read it to learn abt it! its all presented neatly for u! u dun have to attend that much lessons anymore! kk my plan of owning one decent physics book b4 going to NS, so i can ensure most of my 2 years will be spent with physics, is at least finally met for now, 5 days before enlisting...and thats a very decent book indeed, after a few months of hunting.

if u think im weird, i am! go google INTJ haha!!! =p

Bowling / Crashing Ngee Ann and Singapore Polytechnic with Junior

2009-01-15T22:47:00.002+08:00

kk first was the bowling with junior yesterday. junior gotta destress and chill cos its two days after the o level results. and i declare myself bankrupt haha. so i shall just stay at home to read up on the huge load of books ive just gotten and borrowed, and really minimise on travelling. spent quite a lot of transport (and apparently transport fares TRIPLED on average) over the past few days because of this o level result thing and also meeting up with old friends, and doing some filming.

this was a rather high score in the third game, and the first two werent very fantastic.

VISITING NGEE ANN POLY

i guess visiting would be a better word than crashing. part of the reason why i wanted to go there with junior was to see for myself wad life in poly is like cos ive never visited one before, and also bcos my junior wants to go there, as in to study there, when his o level result could have gotten him into one of the better jcs. my advice at first was totally against it, since he was keen on going to uni after that, might as well go through a levels.

but i got to see for myself wad poly is like first before i can make a decision, cos i hear the cut off point for some courses to poly is decreasing (meaning the demand is increasing). right now im busy giving advice to juniors who're deciding on subjects and which school to go to, be it on msn or phone etc. of cuz when im asked about subjects i would say Physics instead of Bio. =p but the sch part, i only noe about jc, how can i talk about poly? later i will talk about wad i got out of my poly visiting experience.

at the same time due to all the gatherings and stuff im kinda busy. i cant sacrifice meeting frens and juniors time, and yet i've got a pile of books on my table, physics and math in particular, that ive yet to absorb and master if possible. and the worst part is im going to NS in less than 2 weeks time!!! i wan to finish my books!!! arghhh...its very tempting to have a book on the table and yet knowing u havent mastered everything in it. im going to slowly finish mastering the classical theories (including the math) before i go on to quantum and relativity, must pace slowly, worst part is the BMT i cant come out except for a few book outs...gosh time is so tight suddenly, i got a big aim in mind...=)

ok the above pic shows me standing beside ngee ann poly's map. to know where i am just enlarge the pic and look at the 'you are here'. i didnt really know how big a poly is. and yes i noe my shirt is way too small.

and actually the first thing that i saw was 3 groups of people SMOKING at the gate of the campus (cos they cant smoke inside, they have to put signs everywhere showing no smoking and how much fine etc), so i had to hold my breath before going in. when i went in i saw all people with all sorts of hair, brown, rebonded, and also extra mini skirts. of cuz, its a tertiary institution and theres no such thing as prefects catching u for being late etc.

it was a totally alien place, really a different environment. oh yea and almost everyone in the canteen was using a laptop, they need a laptop for their courses.

lecture theatre (i though it was a bomb shelter haha)

another lecture theatre

i sort of sneaked from behind and got a picture of an ongoing lecture. didnt catch the words on the screen, it was a biochemistry lecture i think.

the view from 7th floor. we went up to one of their buildings. the poly is very big, and singapore poly is even bigger.

the pictures above and below give u an idea of how many departments the place consists of, but they are not everything of course.

the above pic shows the newest building i think. i was getting quite sick of that place because i feel kinda out of place. there is an activity going on at the first floor in this building which we almost missed! and its the JAE application area, lecturers were there busy explaining their courses while students who were of my juniors' age were busy asking this and that.

i remembered students welcoming my junior and i when we went in and they asked wad my L1R4 for...so i lied 'erm 14...' i was expecting them to say wow quite high (cos my impression of poly is that the l1r4 shld be almost 20, so that the l1r5 is 20 plus..., but ive forgotten im in a top poly and im asking for one of the most demanded course: business) the guy answered, 'oh 14 erm i can recommend these two courses in the school of business,. u may NOT be able to get in the rest because there are people with single digit L1R4 competing blablabla, cut off point is around 12.'

anyway my junior consulted the business lecturer, who looks rather pro. she said abt the merits of jc as well and how people in poly get to uni and get scholarships etc. actually i find that the courses are quite appealing. business statistics, marketing, retail, web design etc. certainly will appeal to those who hate rigorous academic but like all these. i mean if u really wanna start a business u dun nid that much higher order education, just got to be taught how to utilise ur tools properly and some skills and its ok already, else Bill Gates wun opt to go out of Harvard (he must have considered the schooling to be a waste of time) to start his business. the trick is to get out and experience the real world asap i guess.

haha if i really am super passionate in business this course MIGHT come to me as an option. or maybe bcos its a top poly so they made the course look that attractive haha. but of cuz theres no physics at all. i would still prefer academic life ultimately.

VISITING SINGAPORE POLY

ok next we visited singapore poly. it is about 7 bus stops away only. this is another poly well known for business course (according to junior). in terms of its name i dun think its not as good as that of ngee ann's. but the facilities were new and really good, and it looks more high class. but if i really care about looking at high class facilities and LTs i wouldnt have gone to HC anyway. this time there were no smokers outside the gate as we went in from the gate right at an MRT station. apparently u cant smoke at the station either.

the main building where the JAE activity was held was right at the gate. this time i remembered the 'business guy' saying cut off point is not a problem when we asked about it. he said shld be able to get in easily no nid to talk about that...

inside the building...

i was starting to feel quite comfortable walking around in a poly already, after a few hours in ngee ann poly...but look at me, i need to change my hairstyle and clothes to fit in that place.

lecture theatre in singapore poly...

stadium with the letters SP on it...

is this an electronic gu zheng??? on the table. i came across of this when i looked through the window.

ok anyway heres my conclusion, the general opinion that only people who cannot make it to JC go to polytechnics needs to be changed! first is the cut off point, second is the fact that they really have specific courses that are appealing to people who know wad they want in the future, third is the financial circumstances of a family, if the child needs to go out and work as first as possible a diploma would be best. of course there are people who really cannot make it to JC, but discover their passion in a poly. when everything u are doing is to ur liking, and u noe u are acquiring the skills to do wad u will enjoy, im sure u will gladly do it.

i believe everyone has a drive to learn. the only thing is the topic of interest and the method of learning. rigorous academic may turn someone off. poly allows a person to interact more with the real world.

also poly requires u to be independent and u GROW UP fast in a poly...people who are passionate about what they are learning are much more fortunate than people in JCs who are totally clueless about what they wan to do in future. the future goal and ambition is enough to make them work twice as hard for wad they want.

having said all these, my advice was to go to a JC if u're keen on going to university and are sure of it. my junior agreed.

O Level Result

2009-01-13T22:17:00.006+08:00

ok im very excited about physics now, esp bcos of the activities ive been doing these few days. but i will not talk abt it in this post. but its bcos of ppl i met (including those on facebook), people i met on some string theory grp are adding me as fren xD...maybe i shall create another account for physics discussion. and bcos of those books ive read these days. =)
ok back to the main topic...

O LEVEL RESULT

today i will elaborate more on what happened yesterday. first thing in the morning i received a msg from my junior saying that the msg is 9.8 and i was rather disappointed. he said a few subjects gone up though and they had half day. so my impression was the results were not impressive but not bad. of cuz, i had to travel there to take a look at the atmosphere. i have a HUGE lot of juniors in this batch, more than 2007 batch...if there were two batches in CHS i am most familiar with it would be our own 2006 batch and this 2008 batch.

o level result release for this batch especially can never be missed!!! so i arrived at about 1pm and the first person i met was yong siang. of cuz i knew how they were feeling and had to calm some of them down.

when i went to the hall of fame to take a look, i saw the little number of 8A1 scorers (above), and i tot this year the results really dropped. well that was before i realized the number of 9A1s rose to 22!

in the pictures above and below u see the people crowding around the hall of fame list. really reminds us of our own experiences...

the atmospehere at the hall.

mr lee was delighted!

in the video above u see mr lee talking about our achievements. mr lee did talk about the whole o level top scorers list being dominated by cat high guys right before the applause at the beginning of the video but i didnt record it. too late lol. this explains the huge applause at the beginning.

the media came and from the pictures above and below u see the top scorers moving up the stage to take a photo. mr edwin heng was busy announcing, ok 10 A1s go up for the reporters to snap photo, ok 9A1s join in...i'll elaborate why the reporters come later (if u havent watched and read the news...)

students getting their results...super nervous mood.

lol mr lee getting interviewed.

students with 7A1s

statistics for every subject

mr lee was talking abt the number of ppl getting these distinctions and he said if u add them up its almost everyone haha! and anyway from the statistics in this pic right above u see our 2006 batch started the ball rolling, which was exactly wad mr pillay said when we talked to him. we worked so hard remember and it paid off, from a 12.0 we went all the way up to 9.5! it was like a miracle i would never ever forget it. the reforms were actually useful, and its thanks to all the hard work the teachers put in too, students and teachers worked together to bring about this, thats why i can never forget it. future batches got to sustain it!

although the 2008 batch did worse in terms of the msg, they produced the most number of top scorers. and its 35.3% of the total national top scorers. thats something that only the raffles family had achieved before, according to zaobao (which had catholic high printed on the front page).

anyway i met up with juyong and jaren (who came for the results also) and later kenneth came too. and he brought his sis along and seriously the cat high people were like wow theres a girl walking around, one even waved desperately to her...no comments on that though...

this year, our main focus was on improving the languages, and we did it, but at the expense of the humans and mathematics slightly dropping. but for english we achieved 60% distinction, and HCL i think 40+ percent. i suspect this is one of the main reasons why the top scorers (9A1s and 10A1s) increased, bcos the languages are always the subject preventing the people (including me) from getting a perfect score. so the approach was right and the number of top scorers shot straight up.

ok below are the articles from lianhe zaobao.

FRONT PAGE (above)

page 6

page 6 also

Release of O Level Results TODAY!!!

2009-01-12T20:55:00.003+08:00

kk i wun talk much, tmr then elaborate. i will outline some of the main highlights.

LOL this pic tells u everything abt the results this year...

a sample of a super zai o level results slip.

2 juniors cried though, and i NEED to console them and to give advice for them to make wise choices for JAE. its going to be very foolish if the feelings will affect rationale decisions, or worse still, limit one's potential. haiz...cheer up ppl...

2 years ago i will be in no position for consoling these ppl. cos my point of view is like that at that time: if i can't go into HC 2 years ago, it would have been doomsday...i would have faced severe depression. the keyphrase above is 2 years ago...

but think of it its kind of meaningless now isnt it??? its just like many years ago, fought so hard for triple science...wads the pt ultimately? maybe u get to mix with gd company, or competitive class etc. wads the point of fighting for RI after my PSLE??? im so contented in cat high and i never regretted going to CHS. im so glad i didnt make it to RI and went to CHS instead... and to be honest i was quite sian when i got to CHS initially. at that time i simply cant picture how attached i will be eventually and how often i would go back and think abt the gd old times at catholic high again...

many years down the road...ur perspectives will change...things that seemed like doomsday scenario may seemed perfectly fine a few years down the road...

Release of O Level Results

2009-01-11T23:27:00.003+08:00

its release of results tmr...and i dunno why i'm feeling so excited. ok im CLOSEST to this batch of juniors though, more than the 2007 batch. and i heard everyone has very high hopes for them. after all everyone had low hopes on the 2007 batch and suddenly poof they achieved such great results.

im sure tmr will be another historic moment for CHS. once again it will be a celebration, CHS WILL perform well!!!

i was recalling our batch's own results day while chatting with those nervous juniors on msn and i remembered i went to cat high at like 8am. i was feeling very nervous of cuz but the teachers, who already knew the results, were extremely pleased. mr dennis leong was shaking hands and when i went towards the HOD room, i coud hear my leong announcing our math msg and every teacher was clapping and cheering. mr danny tan was skipping with joy, yes no exaggeration!!! all the teachers became students for a moment.

i was happy of cuz and i knew it would be gd news. and mrs anna tan told us the whole 4-5 got A1 for e math. so thats one A1 guaranteed. plus mr lee hak boon was walking around the staff room corridor smiling and saying woah very gd, very gd ar...

those were really fond memories...that time corresponded to my time in RJ, so maybe u can imagine how much joy i found just by going back CHS and seeing everyone so happy and celebrating. for a moment my own o level result suddenly become not that important at all. cos my main motive was to leave which sch i was in...sort of disillusioned also.

haha talking to those juniors brings back my own fond memories. hope that can ease their nervousness as well. nevertheless, gd luck to all those getting their results tmr...cat high will soar!!! once again!!! gosh im excited!

ok i shall end this post with the video of the celebration of our own batch's results.

Letting go...?

2009-01-10T13:03:00.003+08:00

this post is continued from yesterday.
well, its been a while since my frequent visits to chs, if u dun count that visit 3 days ago, thanks to the hectic jc2 life, now ive graduated from jc, and that lessons in sec sch are starting, i find myself visiting that place so often once again.

even when i felt sad during the post prelims / pre a levels period...i went back to sit at the CHS study area just to chill. or at times i stare blankly onto the field and the track from above and relax. being alone does not help me to sort out my feelings, as my mind fills itself with negative thoughts, being alone AT THAT PLACE does...

anyway...
after juyong's lesson yesterday, as we were walking together towards the staff room, i met miss mary hua, and i was in the chs pe shirt, she was staring at me of course. she laughed and jokingly said, 'u cannot let go right?'

indeed, i guess i just cannot let go...its astonishing how sitting back in those classrooms to attend lessons could bring about such a wonderful feeling.

seeing juyong teaching while the whole class was noisy reminds me of how miss lai, who stepped into 3-5 as a temporary teacher, tried to teach while we were talking and being inattentive.

so i tried being a student there again. as andrew has said, 'by wearing the pe shirt, we've just demoted ourselves from big seniors to a mere sec 4 at most.' yes, if we had worn home clothes there, we would have been treated with more respect i guess. but seriously, i would rather walk about in the sch as 'a mere sec 4 student'. it gives me, and everyone else, the impression that im still there, part of them, not an old boy.

i feel so at home in that very building. and even as i buy food from my favourite western stall i felt as though it was year 2006 again. yes, its good to feel emotionally attached there, and occasionally going back as an old boy. its been 3 years since im there. two other batches have already graduated since our batch. i myself have graduated from and gone through a whole period of jc life already.

the hectic jc life sped past as though ive never gone through it at all. or perhaps my brain need some rewiring, the visit back to chs yesterday screwed up the chronological sequence of memories and thoughts in my mind. memories of studying in hc seemed to be more distant than those of catholic high. or perhaps i just got to acknowledge, both consciously and subconsciously, that those fond memories are nothing but memories...

Bowling with Junior/ Back to CHS to Support Juyong as Relief Teacher

2009-01-09T22:37:00.006+08:00

firstly, bowling was great! new high score!!! =) played two games with junior at civil service club in farrer park (waiting for o level results) and then one more on my own...first two games were not that well, esp first one cos the 10 pound balls here have such big holes and i had to use 9 pound ones. making a strike is super difficult esp with straight ball like me, but eventually i got used to them hehe and i got the new high score! =p incredible LOL!

hehehehehe xD

this was the second game...

SUPPORTING JUYONG AS RELIEF TEACHER IN CAT HIGH

thinking back, i could have been there in front teaching, if not for the jan 28 enlistment...shattered wadeva plans i had...sigh...nvm. it was actually agreed long ago i would come back to teach and i was so looking forward to it, and mrs tan was creating opportunities for me all the while, but when she approached me i had to reject it, cos she needs someone for one month...wad a pity. haiz...

i really really think it would be a perfect job, of cuz apart from gd pay, but look at me, i have been going back there all the time and teaching and helping the juniors is something i LOVE! (and i have been doing so be it in wadeva means) for eg after sch staying back for consultations and all that, everyday would be so meaningful and i would live with such satisfaction...while safely telling myself that i have found a holiday job. isnt that killing two birds with one stone? i dun have to juggle between frequent visits to catholic high and a job...arghhh. after my NS, 7 months break, i better secure a relief teaching job...nevertheless, i recommended andrew lin, desmond and juyong to her and juyong accepted the offer. =)

anyway, back to today. i met up with andrew lin before going to catholic high, we planned to sort of crash juyong's lesson and support him eh? haha. so we wore cat high pe shirt.

this was the view of him by the window outside the classroom...

we were later discovered by the students for taking pictures outside, haha so we went in. i asked, 'is this mr ngiam?' and one of the students answered yes. so i tot he was addressed as mr ngiam but later i found out people addressed him as either juyong or even keeyong (dun ask me why). i remembered saying, 'juyong just continue teaching.' and someone told me to address him as mr ngiam LOL.

the above pic shows juyong explaining math question to some student. he was taking over mrs anna tan for a month as she has to attend a course. andrew and i were sitting at the back of the classroom. it felt so great back in CHS classroom attending lesson in CHS shirt, just that the teacher is now ur fren and everyone is younger than u. much much younger. this sec 3 batch that juyong is teaching now is 4 years younger than us, same as martin...imagine how time flies.

i can't believe i can ever sit in a cat high classroom like that again. and i realize how much i MISS studying in those classrooms...i can't describe the feeling, its very great, yet i can still feel a slight bit of sadness...

the above videos show juyong teaching...the class is kinda noisy though.

and heres everyone greeting juyong after he's done with his lesson, addressed him as mr juyong...

and thats me in the classroom! feels so great, seriously...

after the lesson, we went down to the canteen to eat with juyong...

well, the teacher and the two students...haha...notice im in shorts, meaning it was bought when i was in sec 1! 6 years ago!!! my shirt too, and both still fit me. i can easily pass off as a sec 3 at least in my attire.

SPORTS CENTRE

later juyong stayed in school for consultation with some guy from 3-5 this year. he wanted to learn more abt the upcoming chapter and i helped a bit in explaining. initially he thought juyong was teaching his other students (andrew and me when he saw juyong chatting with us) and did not want to disturb. see i said i pass off easily as a student. why make it so formal anyway...just consult as a friend can already haha.

went off to sports centre with andrew

the above pic shows the sports hall from inside, after some exploring i realized that the sports centre is ONLY made of two sports hall that are almost the same. both are two storeys high and so the sports centre is four storeys tall. its just two halls and i was looking forward to some advanced gym or something so it was a bit disappointing. gosh, cat high needs new land!

the view from the top of the back of sports centre building, means staring at primary school and canteen area.

pri sch ppl playing basketball as seen from there.

the view from front of the building. ive always taken picture of the building from below. but now its from above eh? this is something new lol. the scenery and breeze is damn nice!!! perfect place just to slack around in catholic high and stare at wads going on at the field.

the view towards j8 from the building.

this is perhaps the best way to ensure everyone gets a chance to toss the ball into the net if there're extra balls but not net.

if u have tried to enter the sports building from the front then u find that theres no door, thats wad desmond, waikit and me tried to do the other time. the entrance is from the BACK as seen from the pic above. u enter through the walkway and climb up to the highest storey.

FEELINGS

its getting late. dun think i'll talk about feelings for today, will talk about them tomorrow. yea...

To Zanarkand (Final Fantasy X) on Piano

2009-01-09T00:18:00.002+08:00

i said before, i WILL learn 'to zanarkand' before the holiday ends. im getting there already! =) yay! but still not perfect yet haha.

description i put on youtube: me playing to zanarkand on the piano, first time recording and i hope to improve on it, quite a few mistakes and i tend to suddenly rush esp when moving from softer (mp) to louder (ff) part. guess i was a little nervous with the camera 'staring' at me. will upload a better version soon. =)

Gatherings

2009-01-08T11:06:00.006+08:00

i'll let the pictures do most of the talking..

AMK HUB

first is the gathering with caichen, mingyao and jiaqiang on sunday. in amk hub. now its the time to get used to the new transport fares...i mean from my house to amk is already $1.10, i can't imagine it.
the two pictures below is taken in the macdonalds beside amk hub.

ALVIN'S HOUSE

the gathering with john and alvin yesterday. of course we went to catholic high since his house is so near. john and alvin went to play tennis but my main reason in going there is to meet the teachers as well as juniors. =)

picture with mrs anna tan

with mr lin dan wen

3 pictures taken with john below, all at alvin's house...

and then the tennis...

we met ho wee seng (in case u didnt know its the petitioner, in 4-6 (2007)...)
and he could recognize so when i asked him who i am he actually thought i was the batch one year YOUNGER than him...

the fully completed sports centre. yesterday the table tennis people were moving the tables from the hall to the centre...

i caught a photo of a v-neck PE shirt haha. in case u didnt know its the new PE shirt designed by mr goh kee yong i heard. and many many MANY people are against it. from wad i know most people refused to buy it.

met mr lin dan wen while he was playing basketball, all he could remember about john was, "ahh u all are from 4-5, qiu jian xing, always got scolded by me!"

Pre NS Gathering

2009-01-07T23:59:00.000+08:00

kk im gonna have 3 pre ns gatherings, this (photo below) is the second one. i shall leave my indonesian trip aside (alot to talk abt but havent found the time!), and my physics books aside in this blog.

some things in life come as a surprise. i remembered looking at photos from the prefect exco gang (during outings), be it in facebook or momo's blog, and wondered what it would be like if i were inside those photos as well. they are ppl who stick together even after a long time, and its like nth could separate them, in other words, i see truest friendship and deepest loyalty among them and thats very rare!

just a few weeks ago i was looking at another photo of their recent outing, and a few weeks later i was suddenly inside the picture. one fine friday evening i suddenly find myself seating in j8's food court being introduced to the grp itself, for the first time in my life, and now, a few weeks later, got invited for kind of a gathering. and i wonder why it took me so long to decide whether i should even turn up, or felt reluctant about turning up. i was nervous though, very nervous. but looks like ive made a very right choice in turning up! well, yea clayton was there too. its kind of unreal, i wouldnt have dreamt of something like this a few weeks ago, sitting among the people in a photo in an outing/gathering. and its bcos of the fact that these are the people who have left a deep impression in me (from the photos i see of them and the things i read about them and also my own inference), that i felt really happy to get to know them better. i may appear reserved, i was just 'shy' in that sense. i definitely enjoyed it.

and yea i look tired but its my eyes, whenever i appear in photos my eyes are always small. i dunno how to stare at a camera and smile WIDELY, and such things affect the photo most!

thanks guys! esp cal! thanks a lot! =)

and the photo is incomplete in terms of the people haha, one day it will be fully complete!

Past few days...and Ferry to Indonesia...(Tanjung Balai and Tanjung Batu)

2008-12-30T23:55:00.003+08:00

tonnes of things happened lately, since friday everything doesnt go normally. i'm used to the everyday learn something kind of life, still not using my time very efficiently though, i still get absorbed in dramas and all that, and i still spend so much time online, like now, nvm wad really matters is wad i do online...

FRIDAY

havent had time to really blog since thursday night. either im away or busy, or thinking, or simply tired. on friday i felt kinda lost after being offered something...in my whole life i've never seen something organised so well and efficiently by my friends, let alone participate in the process. many people have great dreams and ambitions, but do they really carry out whatever it takes to fulfil them?

if they do, do they just plan and try to do something or really organize everything efficiently and make sure it happens? and set targets and timelines? i must say, its truly amazing how everyone stays committed and takes the initiative to do whatever it takes to fulfill the goal in his mind, without any external pushing factors...the sole motivation is from the common aim. always keep the aim in mind when doing something, only then u'll be able to achieve it. but dun neglect the process though. if u are reading this and do not know what im talking about, its ok, because im not going straight to the point yea...

before i even have time to sit down and think properly what exactly is happening and make plans, i had to packup for the trip to indonesia. i wasnt really looking forward to it at first cos i was expecting it to be very boring and its a sad thing my grandma is so ill. after all, what can i do in the middle of a forest, in an old house? when i last went there i was in primary 2, of cuz, i was so young, i did not bother to learn the way they live or to simply gain experience, in my memory it was boring there.

furthermore, my cousins werent there at that time, one was 2 year old i can hardly recall him, two others werent born, now that im back suddenly i met 3 of my cute cousins for the first time i my memory and played with them. people who were my close relatives but yet have been living different lives all the while. yes its in this year 2008, they are younger than me, but are living in an ultra technologically backward countryside without water or gas tap or electricity. thank goodness they got a generator to settle the electricity though. and get logs for fire to cook, and get water from a well. imagine suddenly realizing u got 3 cousins there...amazing eh?

i couldnt sleep on friday night. i was hoping i could stay at home and just think thru stuff and not do anything else, my mind is too occupied...how to go indonesia?
and now im so glad i went. because it was so enjoyable, not to mention the gd news that my grandma is getting better after drinking our bird nest. it was really so so fun...the house is super ulu, im not gonna elaborate much but remember no tap, no electricity, no gas, in the middle of the forest. the moment i set foot in there i immediately forgot everything i was worrying about back in singapore.

u find that in such a village there's no such worries, everyday is stressless and carefree. u wake up and while everyone in singapore or taiwan or hk is working so hard to try and achieve the highest living standard and social status, u are separated from them and sort of separated from the world. u do ur daily routine, play with chickens and dogs, pick fruits etc...u do not fight for all the power and status. ive forgotten about a levels or anything...i cant live like that forever, but once in a while its gd to forget everything.

YESTERDAY

back at home yesterday, i was feeling very lost, can't adapt back to singapore life, really missed the kampong place, its a very huge change, gone are the chickens and tall grass and wells and everything, back in a busy city with MRTs that are packed. but at night i was forced to adapt quickly after talking on the msn about the stuff that i was rather occupied with. at least today i woke up feeling somewhat like a singaporean.

talked about stuff on msn, chatted with a new friend about things that had been going on in my mind recently. thats how i was brought back to singapore mentally. i got to adjust back to singapore fully.

just a few days ago i didnt know i have these cousins...

then suddenly i built a lasting BOND with them these few days and i am missing them so much. in the forest they guided me, without them i would be lost, when we went to the city together i guided them, they wouldve gotten lost too they said. and when the father of one of them (my uncle) held his hand to guide him along the way in the city he struggled and broke free and came to me immediately and held mine lol. same for other adults. i only knew these people for 2 days! and more over i was born in a busy city and they were born and lived in the middle of a forest!

a pic we took in the city, dun ask how they get their clothes from lol, their dad visit the city at times.

man i miss them like hell...when is the next time im seeing them again arghh...we dun go there during CNY also cos its too inconvenient. nid to take 2 ships.

ON THE WAY - TRAVELLING IN THE TWO SHIPS

i shall stop after talking about the trip in two ships, cos ive 400 plus photos i cant blog everything at once. got so many things to talk about, not just about the indonesia trip but abt other stuff too. so i shall spread everything out and start from the very beginning.

i love travelling in the ferry, when i last travelled in pri 2, my parents didnt allow me to walk about and i was stuck in the ship feeling very sick of it. now i could climb up and down and enjoy the breeze and learn to appreciate staring at all the islands, including sentosa and jurong island that were in sight. not to mention our very own vivocity at the harbourfront while we were at the sea. really very nice and enjoyable...so i took lots of pictures!

harbourfront

my mum and me waiting to get on the ship

construction taking place at singapore, as seen from the window in the ship, u noe wad they are building don't you...

back of the ship

vivocity as seen from the back of the ship

harbour as seen from the back of the ship

people at the top of the ship, mostly people smoking or wearing sunglasses, i was the only kid wandering around lol

thats the indonesian flag, not singapore!

i wish i could get on this ship though...

=)

front of ship

other ships

video above taken from top of the ferry

the SPC oil area, u noe OIL...its on an island

the water as seen from the back...awesome!

video above

my aunt and mum

extremely beautiful sunlight and scenery, gosh im starting to like taking pictures like these VERY much, BEAUTIFUL!!!!!! and artistic eh? esp with the water splashing nearing the camera. beautiful sky, and my camera skills are improving =p...NICE!

WOW, looks like a disaster if u dunno all the splashing is created by the ship.

most beautiful light from the sky ever!

haiz im staring away from the camera...

my mum and i

we are now travelling from tanjung balai to tanjung batu in a small ferry so from now on its all indonesia...

look at their houses

there are concrete houses as well

ok i shall stop here, its just the very beginning, theres still travelling in car to the house (getting to the middle of the forest is not that easy) and of cuz the house itself, and stayed one day at hotel also. so many things lol. k gotta go off for now. =)

2008-12-30T02:20:00.002+08:00

back from indonesia, lots of changes made to my life these days. found new friend, stayed in indonesia which changed my perspective of sg and stuff. no time to blog about it now its very late! kk will talk abt it tmr probably.

2008-12-26T23:57:00.004+08:00

dunno why of all days after a levels i must go to indonesia tomorrow...its i like i was quite carefree all the while. forgetting about a levels and stuff and suddenly today i got lots of stuff to settle, not stuff to do, its stuff to think which i guarantee is a much more difficult task esp when it concerns very important stuff.

next is an email i got which is 2 pages long if copied into microsoft word, supposed to analyse the whole thing and reply by tmr...

and i have to wake up so early to catch the ferry, im starting to sleep at 3am these days and i wish it can be the same today. but i have to force myself to sleep now else i'll have no energy tmr. since im expecting that i would have nth to do in indonesia i would spend my time to think. but thinking without researching on a computer and without internet...well...

im not going there to play or for holiday, im going cos there was news my grandma is dying and we gotta go and see her. but theres something interesting about that place, though i wouldnt want to live in that kind of place forever.

water is taken from a well.
fire is from cuting logs, no such thing as gas stove.
no such thing as plugs and sockets either.
a chicken is slaughtered everyday and cooked on the logs stove for food.
there is a rifle there for food hunting.

believe it or not, its that kind of place and it still exist even now, and all of a sudden tmr im gonna be separated from the world seriously. in the middle of the forest i will enter a house like that, or a village rather. its very very technologicaly backward...i mean..food hunting and cutting logs for fire...u get wad i mean. i better bring a digital camera. and haiz i hope everyones prediction abt grandma dying is WRONG...

k i shall go sleep...i doubt i will fall asleep though.

Face + Head mixing...the head shape is more important in recognising a person than his face...

2008-12-21T01:24:00.012+08:00

ok im going to post about all these face and head thing again.

something's wrong with the photo above...

alvin's innocent look coupled with john's not so innocent hairstyle = the perfect mix...(photo above)

lol this is damn cute right? guess what? its john's head with alvin's face on it xD. i told wenjie how the photo was made and asked him (on msn) to guess. as u can see below he managed to guess it in a very short time. i guess its because both john and alvin have similar face shapes. so u can 'c a bit of alvin sia' in it kinda easily, ok from here we can't conclude anything yet since the shapes of the heads are similar.

so wenjie managed to guess john's head and alvin's face in a very short time...

for heads with different shapes, read the one on yicong's face on joshua's head later. u find that its a lot more difficult to guess.

later when i ask about yicong's face on joshua's head the hard part comes. u will see it in the chat screenshots below (sorry the size too big). both of them have very different face shapes, and surprisingly he managed to guess joshua's head in such a short time and he NEVER did guessed yicong's face correctly.

i tot the head was difficult, esp now joshua changed hairstyle already. we may conclude that the shape of a HEAD is more important in recognising a person, something that is contrary to popular belief. he said the face is super hard to guess. so u see the same facial features when put onto a head of different shape the person looks differently ENTIRELY so much that he is beyond recognition lol! after so much time still cannot guess correctly who he is...now we know how our brains register appearances...

isn't it surprising if the shape of the head really matters more than the facial features? here i am talking about the features we use the recognise ppl, not really which feature affects how good looking u are etc.

we always tot the face is the main thing, but maybe we identify with the head more. of course from this single 'survey' i can't conclude much either. i tot yicong's face was very easy to recognize cos of the jaw and stuff, that is not so typical of a student face. well just some food for thought, maybe our brains cares more about the overall shape as a whole, and not the distinct features on the face.

2 ppl can look very different even with the same face!

minibond series...

2008-12-17T20:37:00.006+08:00

went with my mum to Maybank towers at raffles place to help listen to the outcome of the minibond series lehman brother thing lol, outcome as in wads gonna happen of it. and im not supposed to reveal, not even to my dad lol, only my mum and i and the bank shld noe. kk anyway before that, the lift at my house is under maintenance and i dunno how it is being maintained this way lol.

yes the door is half opened, no one inside, no repairman, but the lift slightly higher...and i went to try sliding the door, its like a normal door can slide open or close...

next, the minibond thing, i was quite reluctant to go at first, i was like maybe i cant understand wad they're gonna say cos its all chim stuff...let alone translate. but i went anyway. and there were a hell lot of legal documents. i tot is sit at counter listen to them talk abt some stuff and in the end its like those tv show one. u noe on those very high tower, 17th floor in our case, got those rooms for big boss to sit down and hold meeting or to sign contract and read proposal.

and i went in the room and the view was wonderful!!! like maybe the most wonderful view in singapore. raffles place is already the mst beautiful place in singapore lol. no nid go singapore flyer to view all these le...
so i took out the camera and ask my mum to take photo. sadly didnt really caught a proper photo of me in it cos the staff came and talked to my mum and it was SO embarrassing when he saw my mum trying to snap pics of me in that building when we were going there for the bond thing which concerns loads of money lol!

see its a small room with three sofas, exactly like those on tv shows haha. very comfortable.

the splendid view outside.

closer view...this is super beautiful...

that was the best pic my mum could quickly snap of me while the staff came in. super embarrassing. anyway there were so many legal documents, even the staff had problems putting it in a understand-able way cos some of the terms are just legal terms, not meant for me definitely. and so many things to sign. i was supposed to sign as the 'in the presence of...blablabla', while my mum signed the agreement.

and luckily i just turned 18 so the signature is valid! lol. and before that must sign one document saying not to reveal anything abt the outcome. seriously the main point of the document is just to say im not gonna reveal thats it. but its two whole pages long...like 'by referring to you, we refer to the buyer and all the rights blablabla...' legal documents are tiring to read, why not just 'i agree not to say anything to anyone.' one sentence...lol.

my mum had to sign abt 10 times, while its 3 times for me. and i just check to see if got error lor...ya something liddat. and sadly we cant anyhow enter the tower without permission. one day i must go look for some high area myself to go catch the view again and take a proper photo. =)

last time national library also got one restricted area, 13th storey, went there to do CIP with andrew lin, and he got a proper shot. =)

still the view cant beat the one at the maybank tower...

Adobe Photoshop CS4

2008-12-16T23:57:00.005+08:00

finally gotten photoshop and this is the FIRST time i'm playing with it, and erm so these are the photos i've edited. i noe its quite noob and to some extent lame but pls bear with it ok? i've always used the free software Magix Photo Clinic for photo editing and i've never really tried photoshop till today...well...=p

photos are picked at RANDOM...

SPECTACLES

original pic...yes the one with specs is original, if the one without specs is original i think its easier to put specs on.

yicong without specs

yicong with half frame specs...lol, maybe he should consider buying half frame specs instead...looks better.

any idea wads wrong with this photo???

lol this is wad happens if yicong's face is put onto joshua's body...i have to choose the both of them because their faces are aligned in the same vertical way. makes the job so much easier...

anyway here's comments from two people after i ask them wads wrong with the photo...lol one is from junior the other one from dingyi (jc classmate) and both should not noe who is yicong or joshua...

first up: Junior

LOL noticed i say who's weird he say the middle one meaning he find Edmund Toh weird even without editing...maybe i can edit to make him look normal HAHAH. jk...

lol he guessed so many ppl still can't tell there are two people with the same faces...

noticed something...??? the body matters too, not just the face! the EXACT same faces on two bodies can look different because of the size and shape of the bodies, so much that ppl cannot tell there are two same faces and go on guessing and guessing the wrong things even when told that there is something wrong with the photo.
so we do not really just recognize ppl simply by their faces.

at least there's something we can learn...

and also ppl dun look into the faces one by one when asked to spot errors in photos. but if prompted with more detail then at least ppl start to realize that there are two same faces...in the case above my junior has seen yicong before so he managed to guess the real one...as in the body with the real face.

nvm lets look at the second response from dingyi.

NO CANNOT TELLl (first line) means he can't tell anything wrong. but he managed to tell the body with the real face lol. meaning my editing is lousy... =p

k thats it for this lame post LOL.

job...

2008-12-15T22:28:00.005+08:00

looking for job these few days...running here and there. i'm not really THAT keen on one but mum say must find job contribute to family income young ppl cannot stay at home. cos if its things like labour work i dun consider that a meaningful experience or a new skill acquired. but mayb my expectations are too high, im just a person waiting for A Level results. the thing is i wanna just really go and learn and MASTER some stuff during this holidays sort of personal development that kind of stuff. like u noe play instruments and all that, or learn some new skill, would rather sacrifice that 1k or so in this month that i could get from working, after all, how long do i have to wait before i can stay at home everyday and really do the things i wan to do and learn things that i wan to learn? when i retire?

i admit i used to be so free in the past during year end holidays, that time too young no nid work, and i wasted my time away. now obviously i got more commitments and i realized how precious time is. maybe i didnt spend a single holiday meaningfully?? dun talk abt june holidays, those are for revising stuff. im talking abt dec hols.

but given the chance to not work, i would not rot at home and do nothing anymore...i was such a slacker in the past, before sec 3 especially that i dunno how to use the free time wisely, and thank goodness sec 3 hols was spent learning the piano, u see, spend one holiday wisely and i learn to play the piano for life, thats the way...definitely worth more than the 1k i can get from holiday job! in the end? free time does not come easily anymore. i can't expect to wake up and live life at my own pace everyday, doing everything i consider meaningful. my greatest regret is not using my holidays wisely in the past...

i wasted all the time in the past when i was young and energetic to absorb and learn stuff or to look for new experiences, wasted time at home during holidays, only to treasure them now, and realize i dun have such carefree holidays anymore. and i was being psychoed to believe that getting gd grades and a gd cert and using it to find a job with a gd pay is the ONLY thing that matters in life...

wad about other skills we could acquire? other things we could do? passion? hobby? those are not practical so we shldnt waste time on them? then wad are we living for? are we passionate about living or surviving??? its sad when ppl do not really have a passion but go with the norm to build a so called successful career. true, in front of relatives or any other ppl u can stand up, tell them ur job and pay and everyone go WOW u are super successful...while u slogged hard for work day and night so much that u've forgotten wad u are living for. yes, high standing in the society eh?

my mum said theres a lot of money out there and we'll be a fool not to grab them. every hour as long as there is any opportunity to grab money (thru working of cuz) we must not waste, we must go out there to get, cant let go of any opportunity, money is important, without money its gone case.

no i dun agree, every hour? any time we can only think about how to get money in our pockets? then wad else do we do? no way! its hard for me to explain cos then it may lead to further conflicts, its different way of thinking so i shld just follow the grab money way. and its true my mum has slogged hard for work even as a housewife who cooks EVERY meal and wash every clothes and manage a household chores in the past when we were very young, she managed to get 3k income home by working till like 3 or 4am...daily... thats how we were brought up, wad can i say? the money was used to bring me up to who i am now...so i dare not 'talk back' lol.

but i hate it when comparsions are made, like look at so-and-so although studies not that gd cant go JC but he works and give pocket money to his brothers and even buy hp for brother, parents no nid to worry. but still, why sacrifice studying time for that 1k per month from a part time job??? work hard now, just commit to studying, get a decent degree and EVEN if we ONLY wan to talk about practicality and money in the years to come the amount of money earned with that decent degree far exceeds the 1k per month that is forgone while studying...

the next sentence after comparison will be, why he can study and work at the same time and he's so motivated and hardworking while you are NOT in the least motivated. i noe parents always say this to their children as if everyone else is hardworking and the child is the least motivated one so i used to get hurt but now no more lol, maybe its normal this way. they say it but they dun really think it this way.

but who says i have no motivation, i have big dreams and its just that my motivation does NOT come from grabbing and earning all the money available, money and more money, working and working just to get more money...thinking of ways to get even more money, work till 12am that kind. grabbing money constantly is not a motivation, that is no life lol. money is definitely important in todays society, but still not worth sacrificing ur life for it, there are too many things else to live for...

if i were to set a target for a time period, it will always be wad i'll achieve and NEVER how much i will earn. its just that my source of motivation is different, something which clashes with my parents and probably some of my relatives'. but i believe one day i can succeed with this kind of motivation, not in the typical doctor/lawyer/millionaire kind of succeeding, but something far more meaningful and fulfilling, something thats worth more, can't be measured in terms of money...but yet something that practical people will not appreciate.

think abt it, would u rather stay in a condo when u do not even have time to use the facilities bcos of time spent on a 'successful career' or to even admire ur own house or would u rather stay in a 3 room flat but have time to decorate it and turn ur room into a music room or a lab depending on ur interest?

another thing is maybe my expectations are too high. i gave sec 3 tuition at 30 dollars per hour last year. so one day two hours and its already 60 dollars...that was when i used my qualifications to the fullest. so now when i see those 5 dollars per hour i get a bit uneasy LOL. but my mum say better lower expectations. such 30 dollars/ hour lobangs do not just drop from the sky. and i guarantee teaching tuition is a fulfilling experience.

having said all that...still, practicality is an issue. i'll look for a holiday job, as as its a temp job, i shall not talk about passion. though i wish i could find a real meaningful one. or maybe i just gotta noe wad it is like to work outside. but allow me to state the worst way of spending holidays, k according to my opinion --- stay at home and play computer games all day!!!

toot photos...

2008-12-14T22:11:00.011+08:00

recently i was uploading some toot sec 1 and 2 photos onto facebook and we are like commenting on them. nice looking at how small we were lol.

talk abt loyalty to the sch...in sec one i remember our class did the WITS project on how to make the classroom more conducive for learning and we suggested decorating tables and the entire classroom, each has a personalised table etc. lol look at mine...most ppl pasted pictures of singers and stars and all that. while i drew the flag. sense of belonging eh? this is something miss leong ALWAYS brings up when talking abt loyalty, she'll talk abt me drawing the flag in sec one. but its nice isnt it??? the table was like that for a year, meaning i faced the flag everyday, no wonder. =)

ya remember this? comments here...

thats zhenyang, mingyao, waikwan (posing), darrell and yongcheng from left to right. lol yong cheng holding a home econs textbook! lol his look...mingyao also, if im not wrong we were preparing to go for home econs lesson 5 years ago...

wrapping the table after the decoration...

poh choon was the environment rep, sweeping the floor apparently...

ying jie is fighting at the back of the class, super playful i remember...just like me lol.

nothing beats this as the most toot picture of all time...

LOL

never change??? thats so NOT me!

Grand Piano...

2008-12-13T22:02:00.008+08:00

let me blog abt thursday...well im behind time lol. went to do some exploring in high school (that place is big and throughout this whole 2 years i havent really finish exploring the entire place lol...) during the break during cleaning session...and when i walked past the hall i just tried to open the door, well i like to enter the hall and the avt because of the piano!!! arghh..and to my surprise it can actually be opened, i tot the ppl will lock every single room including hall if its not locked...

and i found out theres a grand piano at the high school hall stage omg...so much better than the college one (to think i've been trying so hard to get in the college hall for days...), the college one half broken...woah i can't resist!!! just take a look at it! its been a loooong looooong time since i played something on a grand piano, like 3 years ago during sec 3 dec hols in NAFA, and its a baby grand that time. of cuz i gotta take a video of myself playing ANYTHING on it...and yea no matter how crappy it seems lol.

removed the cover...just look at it...

TO ZANARKAND

this is a music from FF10, the best FF song i would say though i dun play that game. emotion flows through every bit of it and i fell in love with in the moment i listened to it.

i think i shld go back to learning piano like during sec 3 holidays, during sec 2 school days i meddled with almost every instrument i could find...but haiz...still no piano at home, i really want to be able to sit at home and just play the piano instead of sneaking to everywhere to find one. i remembered asking my fren where the C note was, at that time we always go into the CHS music room when there're ppl around just to look around and stuff.

LEARNING THE PIANO...

and my fren was playing canon (the easy version) on the piano and it sounded soo nice...so after asking the C key i decided to try out some chords and my motivation was so high. when trying chords its best to invent ur own playing and just press around to familiarize with the fingering and NOT try to sight read and get urself demoralized...without figuring any chords or wat i think theres no use staring at the score and not know why u are hitting these keys...almost everyday during hols i would go sch just to enter the music room, with or without permission lol...have to sneak u see...then just play and play and one day i could coordinate two hands playing together! u can't imagine the excitement i felt...

im not sharing all these learning process as a piano teacher or a professional, but as an adventure that i have in learning it probably...cos whether or not this is the best way to learn piano i've got no idea...most wun start like that.

i didnt start from the basic...i want to learn canon and i dun have the time to play all the grade 1 few lines pieces to perfect sight reading...i jumped straight to canon, and then ballade pour adeline and forbidden love and the much harder variations on the kanon (my favourite at that time)...and the learning process was super difficult, within a month i could play the first two completely.

but i compared my playing with my fren, something was lacking...mine is just not nice while he's s always nice...and i later tot it was the feeling, cos all the while i didnt realise i simply jammed hard on the keys and play wadeva i see on the score. no wonder theres no variations in volume and speed, like robot, or like midi music...

slowly i learnt to relax and just feel the music, no longer tensed and no longer very concerned abt which finger play wad key that kind of stuff. just let it come automatically...wow and the process was super exciting...

of cuz most ppl learn from the very basic, when they are very young, every piano lesson playing the same old songs again and again, understand all the terms and symbols perfectly and trying to speed up sight reading before actually trying to play a song on their own, probably two or three years has passed by the time they play a pop song or any melody they like. and by then they can read any type of symbol perfectly. they can just look at the score and play out the song. whereas for me for any song i need to find out wad everything in the score means, and i cant sight read the song automatically. i need time to first start to play the song and get the notes and sound right before working on the feelings.

the process in learning each and every single song is much more difficult for me. but the result is the same!!! it MAY even be better, say i may have put in more feelings in the process whereas the other expert follows the score strictly or worse still get the beat and notes PERFECT but never put in feelings. in the end, both of us are able to play the same song.

still i wun recommend this kind of accelerated learning style cos i will be stuck at almost every new score for a while before getting used to it. whereas a person who's learnt the foundation for years might have come across every chord in the score already...thats y ppl can look at the left hand part of the score and dao it because they are so familiar with that type of chords already...

me trying to play out to zanarkand (TWO lines, with the first line wrong...way to go...)

back to the zanarkand music, very nice, and recently i JUST started to learn it, like probably for two or three days. on thurs it was still very bad, i only managed to scrape through two lines and nevertheless i took a video anyway cos i wanted to know how the grand piano sounds on camera! nice...the sound i mean not my playing. as u can see from the above video i have a really long way to go before learning the complete piece. but at that time i was equally helpless with variations on the kanon and i tot i will never be able to play it at all but look now it comes automatically.

so i shall just practise! =)

the way i learn new songs is again different cos i dun have that perfect foundation, i memorize the entire first page of a score when i first look at it so i can sit down and play it everytime i come across a piano, ANY PIANO. i'll grab the opportunity and just practice and coordinate and retrieve the score from my memory. i dun have the luxury of having the score right in front of me and figuring it out at home...i have to memorize and grab hold of any opportunity i have with a piano and then just play. first time it will sound horrible, totally nth like the real tone i hear, but i just keep on playing, there will be many many mistakes, just play till im 95% sure there will be no mistakes before i move on to the next page...its a very very slow process...eventually when i can memorize and play everything i have to play the whole song and link everything together. thats y the songs i play are always memorize...nevertheless, i must master 'to zanarkand' by this holiday...by any means...

2008-12-12T20:51:00.003+08:00

i got a virus in com! argh!!! i dun really have anti virus (except for windows defender if u consider it one...) cos it lags the com even more than when u have a virus in it...but i was always very careful and each time i run any scan it will say 0 threats or critical objects...and today i actually was so careless to download some stuff and got my com into a mess. just one spyware is enough to bug the whole com. i got this winpatrol thing which identifies any changes to ur internet homepage o any new program that want to run on startup and all that. very gd u can even view the list of programs that run on start and approve or disable them, such as msn...well...

thank goodness still got tat, every now and then the thing tried to change my internet homepage and tried to run on startup. arghhh. i only experienced this one time (im very careful u see and i maintain the com well =p)...im running FOUR scans now...checking for virus/spyware and wadeva object. i used to like spybot search and destroy cos it seems to destroy everything and make ur com perfect. i CAN'T tand spywares in the com, one is bad enough...spyware doctor is the best currently, damn this thing got some trojan downloader into my com, ive got ELEVEN critical objects now thanks to it. it must've downloadd more nonsense and if i dun remove it soon the com will probably be filled with more adware...got ome hijacker identified also grrrr..nvm fFOUR SCANS...it can't escape. =) sorry i mean 5 scans...just opened one more...

Eventful Day...

2008-12-09T23:33:00.004+08:00

CLEANING SESSION

today was rather eventful, firstly the cleaning session was seriously the worst one ever lol. the place behind the lab was way too horrible! i've never seen so much dust before and its useless wiping off dust from the wall and window and frames and doors. seriously useless no matter how hard i tried, and after finishing one small patch the clear water in my pail becomes OPAQUE. my suggestion is the whole wall be washed thoroughly with water, like spray or something. but who's gonna do it anyway, they cant let me do it cos they are probably afraid i would spray the labs down lol. so i shall just wipe, its like spreading the dust and the water probably made the dust stick more onto the wall. only after wiping at least 3 times over does it look somewhat presentable.

i finally got to ride in the rubbish truck around the sch when i go to different places to clean lol...very cooling, but very noisy too. i've long wanted to ~~drive~~ ride that.

WORDS OF WISDOM

then at abt 11.45am mr chua suddenly sms me to ask if im in sch cos he's there. so we met in the staff room to have a short chat, finally, wad was the topic about...hmm...about my punishment and different careers are pursuing future. words of wisdom, "when u have a passion, just go for it, dun worry abt anything else, they can be adjusted...u r already blessed to have a passion, most have none..."

VERY MINI 4-5 MEETUP

went to meet some of the 4-5 people at abt 1pm plus and its still not a lot of people. met at dhoby ghaut and walked around plaza singapura before watching them play pool. left at abt 3pm to go watch BOLT with clement, after which we met up with larry and saimeng also. so today met both 4-5 and 2-3 ppl. think the 4-5 ppl went off for some sushi buffet which i probably cant afford so go movie. =)

with flash

without flash

trinity stunned when he found out he made a foul

MOVIE

bolt was nice, animation was wonderful and the plot is not bad also. seriously i love all these cartoons, many of them have beautiful plots and meanings and its seriously not easy to put in emotions and stuff using animation. finding nemo's another gd example. this is unlike movies like quarantine, with ppl acting but but totally no plot no meaning and u can tell the director and scriptwriter is seriously slacking...so u see cartoons are not as meaningless as they may seem. madagascar is one more, whereas those movies that seem cool may turn out to be nonsense.

the movie lasted till 5pm plus, and we wanted to watch 'All About Women' at 7.20pm which i keep telling larry to watch cos he works at dhoby ghaut area and he seemed to be interested to watch some movie someday. but not all about women lol. so he met up with us at cathay after his work just to chat for a while, not for the movie. appeared in his professional outfit again. this time a grey long sleeve shirt, wonder how many of those shirts he has lol.

nvm next week watching movie again...=) and two days more before my punishment ends. =))))))))))